Sit Down Sunday - 12th January 2014

Good afternoon you, yes you reading this post..hello there! :)

I hope you've had a lovely week & if not I hope next week will improve & be just a little bit better. I created this weekly Sunday post a couple of months ago now, but I really look forward to just sitting down & reflecting on the week. We can all have so much going off that we forget to appreciate the little things that made us smile, things that we enjoyed & things that made our week a little bit more bearable.



Here is a list of the things that I've enjoyed this week....

Image belongs to Michelle over at Life Outside London...how adorable is Betty!

Betty does blogging - Michelle let one of her little adorable puppies take over her blog, it is hilarious! Betty is such a little cutie & maybe just a tiny little bit mischievous...am I right Michelle? I really hope Michelle decides to let Pete take his paw to blogging too. Really did put a smile to my face & made me laugh out loud. I highly recommend!
- playing downfall with a family friend (pretty much my second mum)
- visiting my grandma
- having a couple of lovely dog walks
- trying my hand at a different style of post (watch this space)
- getting to practice driving in a different car (more on this tomorrow)
- managing to go in to town without going to my parents shop, something I never actually do...small improvements are better than no improvements :)



I think that is pretty much it for this week. Feel free to leave me a comment & let me know what has been good about your week too. I really do love interacting with you.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

letters from the past, proof how things can change?

Hello there my lovely friend...felt like referring to my blog & readers as my lovely friend, as you do. I am starting to feel like I'm gaining friendships with some of you & it is fantastic! :)

On twitter I mentioned that I found some letters to myself, well to my mind/brain. A few of my followers favourited the tweet so I thought I'd upload them on to here. I had even dated them & put the time on them too. I suppose so I could read back & remember how long ago it was, I'm guessing that was my thinking anyway. So today I have decided to bring those letters to your eyes..to prove to you that things do & can get better. These are fairly personal, nobody has actually seen them..you know so why not throw them out in to the internet. I'm throwing them out there as proof that things can improve, especially when you really feel they can't.



Saturday 23rd June 2012, 2pm
Dear mind/brain, why are you so determined to make me & my body feel so sick. I wake up day after day with the feeling of nausea, sometimes it disappears & fades but it doesn't seem to be long until I realize its back again. Sometimes it is just so strong I can't help but lay down on my bed & want to cry (both to let my frustration & upset out). During the past three years the feeling has been with me, I'd like to think it had gotten easier by now but NO & I'm not used to it, it is STILL in the way. Obviously the normal reaction to feeling so sick is to stay at home, which is what I have done until just gone dinner when I decided I could probably manage to walk into town, oh boy was I wrong. I got half way there & couldn't shake the feeling of nausea or the thought away. It didn't go away, even on my way home. I'm starting to wonder if I'm pushing myself too much. When did it all become so terribly hard? The simple things in life don't seem so simple! Walking to town, travelling in a car, going to the hairdressers & going to the dentists! Why won't this feeling & thought just budge? I eat normal, I drink normal, I don't drink alcohol, I don't smoke, I don't do drugs! But what I do do is worry too much & think too much! One of these days it all has to get a little bit easier, step by step, day by day!!!!

Sunday 24th June 2012, 1.55pm
URRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!
why cant I just lead a normal life, yes nobody leads a perfect life, everyone has problems but seem to manage an average day to day life. Such as going out to work, nipping to the shop or even going out to the seaside for the day. I don't remember the last time I went to the seaside. I'd love to have been able to jump in the car & go to the seaside. The Mend are performing live today at Butlins, Skegness. It would of been a fantastic day & a rememberable experience but once again due to feeling sick I can't really manage a ten minute drive up the road, nevermind a two hour drive. It is making my life so much more harder than it has to be. I'm 20 years old, I'm meant to be enjoying myself, being young & carefree. I'd love to be able to jump in a car or on a train & just go for an enjoyable day out, but I can't concentrate on anything other than this awful strong sick feeling! I miss the days when I could just hang out with friends, go to the cinema or bowling. Those days are long gone & so are the "friends". I have nothing to be worried about but anxiety makes me believe otherwise. When did everything go so horribly wrong?! I know part of life is your meant to do things you don't like but I don't feel like I can physically do it! It is meant to get easier the more you confront it....so when does it seriously get easier?! Eating food is meant to get rid of the feeling but I feel sick if I eat, I feel sick if I don't....feel like I can't win!



As you can tell I obviously wasn't writing my letters with love....I usually end letters with lots of love. Not these letters, I didn't even put my name. I'm really glad that I found these letters actually because recently I've been feeling like I'm not getting anywhere but I'm in a much better place than I was almost 2 years ago, hoooooraayyy! The end of June 2013 I started driving lessons, I clearly couldn't of done that the year before.



I always like to find a suitable image, usually a quote from weheartit & here is my choice for this post....

Image found on weheartit

How true is it really? Life doesn't get any easier, we really do just get stronger. I feel so much stronger now than what I was this time last year. What a difference a year can make. In life nothing has really altered, I've just become stronger & I'm now in a much better place. In my mind set & physically.

I haven't posted this for sympathy of any kind, I have posted this as just a little reminder that things can get better. We can all improve as people & become stronger & handle situations better.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

My Driving Journey - Lesson 50 & 51

step by step, lesson by lesson.
I'm getting one step closer....




Monday 30th December
The morning of this lesson I really didn't feel great to be honest & I've noticed that if I have a longer gap than usual inbetween my lessons then it's even harder to get back in the car but I did it..can I get a woop woop? No, okay then :) To top it off aswell the weather was rain & wind, woooo! My lesson today involved going to the next town & I got to practice a few more roundabouts & different junctions. Then I got to practice driving around some housing estates that I had been around before which could be the test route they take me on. The word test used to really scare me but good news is now I'm alot calmer about it.

Friday 3rd January 2014
My second lesson this week should of been on Thursday at 9am but Sharon (my instructor) had to change & rearrange, we rearranged for Friday instead at wait for it.....8.15am....yes you read that right 8.15AM! Admittedly I thought I would struggle but I didn't at all, I was up way before. My body seems to be good at getting up without an alarm too, which I love. I thought my lesson today was a manoeuvres kind of less, I was wrong...it was a drive around one. Don't get me wrong I do enjoy all of my lessons anyway. I got to practice a few of the bigger roundabouts & drove around a few other housing estates that I hadn't been around too.


Well, that's my lesson rundown of the week (well last week but you get me). Feel free to leave me a comment about what you think to my driving journey. I love hearing from you!

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Sit Down Sunday - 5th January 2014

Ooohhhh, 2014 & is upon us..Admittedly I did just write 2013 in the post title, opppsiee! If I haven't said it to you already happy new year to you! Also if you are new here, welcome to a whole lot of chitty chat. Get yourself comfy with a drink of your choice & relax. Feel free to get involved in the comments on all posts, I love hearing from allsorts of different people. Don't be a stranger, feel free to come back again :)


I'll get on with the post now, what has been good about this week. Yes, it might also be known to you I've felt like I'm going back downhill but we aren't focusing on that in this post..We are focusing on the positive things about this week.

WOOOOHOOOO!!!!

photo taken from my own instagram

- creating my own mugs (see above & at the end) like Miss Jojangles did here
- receiving an early birthday parcel, thanks Ally :)
- spending time with family
- acting out the "I've been expecting you" scene
with my god mums dog on my lap
- blogging community & the lovely girls that come with it
- Miranda box set, enough said
- Miranda Harts maracattack, oh my! Might even do a separate blog post on this
- receiving the photos I ordered, my frames will no longer have the piece of paper with the size of photo it will fit in

photo taken from my own instagram

Soooo, as you can tell I was slightly impressed..okay, massively impressed with the lovely Miss JoJangles tutorial. I decided to get a different shaped mug (this one is the one that Miss JoJangles used, I think..if not Wilkinsons have a few similar) & I thought I'd customize it to be a funny little thing but also a memory. So that is why I've added my blog url & when the blog was born too.

Have you already done a project similar?
Let me know in the comments & be sure to tell me what has been good about your week too.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

I'm only human, no robots here..

WARNING: IF YOU WANT TO REMAIN IN A HAPPY MOOD, DO NOT READ OR READ AT YOUR OWN RISK! I DON'T WANT TO DAMPEN NO MOODS :)



Okay, so now you've been warned let's carry on shall we?

Recently, as in the past couple of days maybe..feels like weeks, really isn't. I feel like I'm starting to sound like Miranda (I totally haven't watched too much of it..hehe, laughing is good for us yes?) I've felt like I'm going downhill, going downhill isn't a good thing surely? I'm a strong believer of talking it out, if you talk it out & get it off your chest it is more than likely going to make you feel so much better about the situation. So since I turn to my blog to write how I'm feeling, here goes....

feels like the story of my life...image found on weheartit

I think, actually no I know why I feel the why I do.. It's because of the festive period, yes damn you Christmas & New Years....I'm kidding, but that is why I'm feeling like I am. All routines go out the flipping window, goodbye actually having a routine..hello messed up sleeping pattern & messed up days spent doing nothing but lounging about. Anyone else feel like this? Surely I can't be alone..can I?

The end of the year before Christmas made me feel like I was doing soooo well with managing my anxiety, attempting to get into a routine. But now I just feel so much like I'm slipping downhill fast & I don't like it..not one bit! I don't have a permanent job I can call my own. Yes, I help my parents out at their shop (I am soooo grateful) but I really want more independence & a job to call my own, that I worked for & gained on my own...not only giving me independence but hopefully that would boost my confidence too. But part of me is like how on earth will I cope with that? & another part of me has no clue what so ever what I actually want to do. I really need to be able to earn a living, not just exist. I need to be able to pay for stuff myself, nothing in life comes free at all. I feel so hopeless right now....oh, aren't I a cheery one today... 3rd day in to a new year & I'm like one happy bunny, no, no I'm really not...sarcasm is not cool.

I just thought I'd write this because like I said my blog is somewhere for me to express myself & it'll just prove to you all I'm not some kind of upbeat positive robot, I'm only human...we all are. We all have emotions & feelings, don't hold them back & suffer in silence. Speak out how you are feeling. It will lift such a weight of your shoulders, no promises there obviously but I'd hope it would for you.

Always remember....

Image found on weheartit

Yes, admittedly we can have many bad days in a row but it isn't a bad life. Always try & look for the positive things in life, the little things in life can mean so much & can boost your mood just that little bit. After feeling so mehhh today I decided to take myself off out, I managed to walk to my godmums to drop off a few cards & one of my books she wanted to read..whilst there I got to spend time with my family & her super cute dog who quite happily sat on my lap...I actually sat on one of her chairs that spun around & did the whole I've been expecting you....pretty sure it's from Austin Powers, could be wrong. Don't hold me to it :)

If you decided to read this, thank you to you my friend.
I hope you are all having a good day & you know what,
if you aren't that's okay too.
- Anna ♥

WOWZAS....is it an error?

Yesterday when sorting out my drawer I came across one of my notebooks, inside it was my old blog website. I used to blog on wordpress before I joined blogger, I decided to keep that blog open just incase I didn't enjoy blogger or if I couldn't get the hang of it..

The rest is clearly history cos I'm loving blogger & I've totally got the hang of it. But my curious side got the better of me so I thought I'd check out my old blog. To find this....


WWWWWHHHHAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT?!?!?!?!?!?!

What on earth is going on there?! On my old blog which the last time I posted on was in May seems to have 315 followers via email? I decided to create a post with an update for those who might be actually following me via email....the whole 315 of them?! & again....WHATTTTTTT?!?!?!?!

That is crazyyyyy, I'm seriously so happy & shocked! Can it be right?! If it is thank you very much every single one of you..If it isn't then I don't know what to say other than wordpress...you've messed up! shocking!

I thought I'd post this & give anyone a chance to just leave a comment if you happen to be one of those 315 followers who have now moved from the old one.

This is crazzzzzzyyyyyyyyy!

As always, thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

a new year, new hopes & new dreams....2014

 2014 is finally upon us, I don't spend my time wasting the days of the year away but some days I really don't do much worth while at all. But this year I'm hoping that will change a little & I will create some lovely memories.

I don't usually bother with new years resolutions because let's be honest how often do we manage to keep them? I think most of the trouble is the fact that the new years resolutions are too strict & impossible to change with the click of a finger & alot us are inpatient. New years resolutions can be made doable if you just find the right way to phrase it & decide on a plan to how you will achieve it.



2014 can be made the same as every year, a year for us all to move forward in our lives & better ourselves. I thought this image was so cool & showed exactly the direction we should all be heading. Either towards the sun or forwards. Maybe you will be heading towards the sunshine on holiday, oooh lovely & enjoy....

Image found on weheartit



So after thinking about my new years resolution I created last year, there was only one. I can remember writing it down even now, almost a year on from when I wrote it. I remember writing it down in the back of a notebook (can't find the notebook now) & the one resolution I had was to learn to drive. I didn't put any pressure on myself to learn straight away at the beginning of the year at all. I started in June, what a great decision that was & I'm now months (oooh, or maybe weeks...that would be telling) away from my practical test. Since I have completed that new years resolution I thought why not create myself one this year, apart from the 'one' I decided to create turned in to a few more....

I'll get on with listing them now shall I? Yes Anna, crack on...you know it's completely fine to talk to yourself every once in a while..or every day.

Live a more healthier active lifestyle
I'm going to be realistic about this one, which is key to anything really. I'm not going to plan to run a marathon next month, that just wouldn't happen. I just mean to cut down on junk food, not all junk food.. cutting down on everything would be crazy right? Well I think so anyway, its all about moderation & we all need little treats every now & then. You won't find me signing up for the gym neither especially since I'm surrounded by such lovely areas to walk. So I just mean to eat less junk because that can have an effect on how I feel & get out & get more fresh air.

Spend money on experiences & less on materialistic things
I think this one pretty much speaks for itself. I really do love abit of shopping but how scary is it to think that people can just take away your purchases & nothing is done about it. Where as if you spend your money on experiences then you create memories & can anyone take memories away from you? No. Can anyone change those memories? No, they can not. So I hope to be able to share some of my upcoming experiences with you on here. I haven't been on holiday for easily over 6 years so an adventure is needed.

Let go of things I can't change
How many of us hold on to things or on to feelings for someone who no longer cares? I'm pretty sure there is quite a few of us who are guilty of this. But over the last year I've actually realized that no matter how much you want someone or something to change, sometimes it just doesn't. That is just the way the cookie crumbles. So I've decided to let go of things in the past that I just can't change, onwards & upwards folks.

Get over my fear of dentists
I was going to add try before this one but if I put try I'm less likely to complete it. I'll just think "ooh, I've just got to give that a try & not give it my all". So I hope to give it my all & hopefully overcome my fear of dentists. I've managed to learn to drive, something I never thought I would be able to do. But looking back on driving that is just proof that if I believe in myself I'm halfway there. I didn't have a dentist for a good couple of years because my dentists shut & then we couldn't find a new dentist so I now need to get back in to the routine of going back. Just thought of one more resolution too actually....

Don't care what people think of me
I thought of this one because when I go to the dentists I will more than likely take my mum, is that 'cool' at the age of 21? I don't really care to be honest. Is it 'cool' to take your mum with you to the doctors? Probably not but I'm not bothered about that either. People don't know my situation or what I'm going through so their opinion of me doesn't matter at all. It is invalid. :)

  ♥

I've decided to add a couple of pieces of advice for you too.

Don't be so hard on yourself. 
With the new year will come new mistakes & that is absolutely fine. Mistakes don't always have to be a bad thing. Mistakes are proof that you are trying so whatever happens in the new year don't be so hard on yourself.

Image found on weheartit

Continue to do what you love
I saw the picture below on weheartit & I thought I'd add it in because yes it made me giggle a little..how many people are all "new year, new me"? Admittedly, I think I have said it before....cringe a little?! But in reality, you aren't going to be a different person when the clock strikes midnight on the 1st of January are you? You don't change in to a new you when the week changes so why would a year change be different? If you want to change you will change by your own choice not because the year has. So this picture made me think of this piece of advice, alot of us internet users will probably want to or expect to try & use the internet less but why do you use it? Why do you spend so much time online? I know why I do because I enjoy it. I enjoy blogging, I enjoy interacting with others, I enjoy reading what others have to say, what videos are floating about on youtube.. So I thought why should we try & create a unrealistic resolution when the reality is we enjoy it. I believe we should all do as much as we can of what we enjoy because at some point it can be taken away from you. What do you think?

Image found on weheartit



Well if you like reading my waffley kind of posts (most of my posts) you have certainly got a treat with this one because it sure is waffley. I really hope you enjoyed it though.

What are your new years resolutions? Have you created a similar post? Let me know in the comments below. I really do love hearing from you..

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥