Go Ape, Segwaying through Sherwood Pines...

Well, what a way to spend a Sunday afternoon. Whizzing around the forest on these beasts...

Can I please go back again tomorrow for another go? Imagine working as a segway instructor, I wonder if it ever gets boring.


Today was my very first time on a segway and I was a mixture of emotions...excited, scared and nervous. At first the segways were a little daunting but I guess it's just the same with anything new.


I bought a forest segway experience for my little brother (he isn't my blood brother, we've been family friends since he was little and when he was little he wanted a big sister, he asked me and I've been his 'big sister' ever since). He turned 13 this year and I thought it would be a pretty unique and awesome thing to do for a special age (I was totally right)! Segway experiences at Go Ape cost £35 per rider for an hour. Yes, it might be pricey but I highly doubt you'd be disappointed! A little tip, check for offers. I managed to get £15 off using my Nectar card points and 15% off too (result or what?!).


The session began with a few rules and health and safety (both on paper for us to read and also we got told them too before we began to make sure we were all clear). Once we were all aware of the rules and were prepared with our helmets (that Go Ape supply) it was time for a little lesson to make sure we were all aware of how the segways worked and made sure we could all control and ride them with ease.

Everyone in our group seemed to pick it up pretty well which was fab cos it meant more time whizzing around the forest (three people didn't manage to keep up but it was ok cos there was more than one instructor who stayed with them). We went around the forest in single file, segway conga anyone?

At first admittedly I was still slightly unsure and felt a little sick on the segway, I think that was because it was a new weird experience...could also have something to do with the motion of the segway but eventually the nausea passed (pretty much once we'd arrived back where we started). In single file the idea was to keep atleast a cars length between your segway and the persons infront, without a doubt at the start you could of fitted a couple of buses inbetween me and the lad infront. We spent just over an hour segwaying which was well worth the £35 per rider (I didn't pay that cos of offers but I certainly would pay that to do it again though)!

If you have the opportunity to go segwaying, jump at it! Seriously, I don't think you'll regret it. If you happen to go to Sherwood Pines hope that you have James as your leader, he was fantastic (I'm sure the others are just as good too). Thanks Go Ape, Sherwood Pines and James (the instructor). James kept stopping and giving us all a heads up before we went through certain parts of the forest. Even coming to my rescue when I managed to run in to a tree, you could say I was a pro...or not! I will definitely be going again!

The last time I was at Sherwood Pines I was watching The Vamps and this gave me the same amount of excitement as seeing them live did! If you love live music and understand the feeling it gives you you'll understand why I added that in.

Have you ever been segwaying? What did you think?

My Invisalign Journey, the consultation...

One of my goals this year was to enquire more about braces. Three things put me off...my dentist, the procedure (cos it's so unknown and alien to me) and the cost (admittedly this one has kind of been an added fib, it'll be money well spent). I've not been happy with my teeth for a long time, during my secondary school years I didn't have a dentist therefore I didn't have the braces option. When I look at old photos of me now I wish my mum would of taken me to one, kicking and screaming. But I think I'm now prepared for it, well you know as prepared as I can be.

I've spent a good couple of months now searching Invisalign stories and before/after pictures online, they are all amazing! I can't believe the difference it makes. So instead of just having the idea going round and round and round in my head of wanting to go for braces but not wanting to go for braces I finally took that first step and booked the initial appointment, my consultation (a free one too, always a bonus right?)!

Invisalign has always been my favourite choice when looking at my options. I'm not going to lie, I didn't do alot of research about the dentists that offered the service. I used the Invisalign website to check out clinics in my area, they have a cool little coding system to let you know the dentists rating too. Then I checked out the website of a dental clinic close to me, but not too close (I don't recommend my previous dentist). Sometimes the journey seems to calm my nerves down a little cos those pesky nerves come in waves. The clinic offered a free consultation. Normally when you think free, it'll be a quick chat? No, not at all. I was in there for just over an hour. The dentist went through everything with me and I can't fault him at all, I'm actually really looking forward to seeing him again (just hope next time he has a little bit of One Direction on the TV instead of Mariah Carey) hehe! The second I walked into the room I felt at ease, I absolutely love people who give off a good vibe. He  examined my teeth to make sure I would be suitable for the treatment (I was, hooorraaayyy)!, he explained to me every option there was to take, all the different kinds of Invisaligns that are available (I didn't realise there was different kinds), how the treatments work, he showed me some real life cases of patients he is currently treating and ones he has already treated, I've got to say I'm impressed with his work. I can't even express how well he explained everything, I'm seriously amazed and highly impressed! 

I'm quite an anxious person so I wasn't exactly looking forward to this appointment but I went for it and you know what. It turned out extremely well! I felt terrible the whole car journey there, thankfully we had about a 5/10 minute wait so I could calm down. I'm going back again on Thursday (26th) for my impressions. I've spent long enough thinking about it, it's now time to take some action. I feel like with the help of Dr Khaliq and his assistant this journey is going to be a breeze. Right now I won't even have to think twice about recommending Bawtry Dental Clinic to anyone!

I'll update you after I have my impressions which I'm dreading but hey, the fear can only control me if I let it. So I'll be heading into the clinic on Thursday calm or on edge and maybe nervous too. But I'll attack it head on!

Expectations and judgements.

Expectations and judgements are two things I really hate in life. Who sets out these expectations that we are meant to live by? Is there actually such a thing as a 'life rule book', no. I highly doubt it. I'm writing this post for those of you who feel alone and isolated because you aren't living life according to the 'milestones' or the people of your age group. I'm one of you, I'm not living life like most people my age, but does that actually matter? No, it doesn't. It doesn't bother me but other people make judgement, does it bother them? I don't actually know, it shouldn't.

My most recent post was sharing an article I read in Cosmopolitan, the article included a list of expected milestones which was kind of interesting but also stupid and upsetting to those of us who aren't living life as we are 'expected'.

There are a fair few remarks that people say to me that irritate the hell out of me. These people don't fully know me, or what I've been through in life so what right do they have to judge me? I shouldn't let these remarks effect me in the slightest but I'm only human so they do, I wish they didn't but I'm not a robot. I can't just block out peoples remarks. 

People pass judgement about relationships, 'oh, don't you have a boyfriend?'. My response to this is, no I don't have a boyfriend. For now I'm quite happy trying to build my life for me. If someone comes into my life then that might change but right now I'm not looking for someone to 'complete' me. Since when did we have to be in a relationship?

People pass judgement about where I live, 'oh, so you still live at home?'. 'Shouldn't you have moved out and got your own place?'. My response to those are, yes, I do still live at home. The clue is kind of in the name, it's my home too. A house that my parents have built as a home for us. When you turn a certain age your home doesn't stop being your home. Just like your family don't stop being family. Family are for life. Why is living at home such a bad thing? I absolutely love my parents (most of the time) and they aren't going to be around forever (morbid but true, but then again I could die before them). What would be the point in me moving out to live on my own, be miserable and struggle? No point what so ever. Yes, I live at home but I still live an independent life.

You know what, there are so many ridiculous expectations and judgements that people make towards each other. Why? What is the point really? Do these expectations and judgements help anyone?

Rant over.

I really hope that atleast one person has read this and thought I'm so glad I'm not the only one not living up to the 'expectations'. We all have very different stories to tell, we've all been through different stuff that has shaped us into the incredible people we are today and we should be proud of it! Be proud of yourself, be proud of the journey you've been on and continue to travel. Screw the expectations and other peoples judgements towards you. The only person who can be the judge of your life is the person living it, you. 

'If life's judged by milestones, I've failed' inspired by Jameela Jamil's article in Cosmo

I'm one of those girls who buys a monthly magazine to the read them straight away in a few months time. Glamour & Cosmos slowly stacking up on my floor, I'm looking at you!

I buy monthly magazines because they seem to have more appealing content, inspiring stories, interesting facts and aren't bursting with rumors and gossip.

When finally sitting down to read one of my many magazines I came across an article by Jameela Jamil, 'If life's judged by milestones, I've failed'...me too Jameela, me too!

In the article Jameela shares how she recently (many months ago now, I'm guessing) came across an article that listed major life milestones and the age at which we're expected to reach them by. This inspired me to share the list she shared in Cosmo and give my responses to the milestones on the list. I tried to find Jameela's article online but I couldn't find it and it was in the September issue so you can't even read it in the magazine itself, oops!

I'd safely say 2 or 3 days of the week I compare myself to others, doubt my ability, doubt my life but you know what. That's normal and there is no such thing as a perfect life or life plans or life rules. Go with the flow, we all live very different lives. We're all at different stages of our lives, we all have different challenges thrown at us but the important part is that we are still going strong and moving forward.

I still thought this would make a pretty interesting post for you and me.

Enough of the chit chat, on to the list hey?!

First kiss (expected age, 15) I was in my teens so we'll go 13, 14 or 15.

First full-time job (expected age, 20) ...nahhh, I'm still not in full time just yet...I'm swaying more towards the 24 mark...four years behind!

Pass driving test (expected age, 20) add 2 years and you've got it! I was 22 when I passed my driving test.

First holiday with friends (expected age, 20)...damn, we're expected to do a lot in our year of being 20! I've never been on holiday with friends so I'm failing at this one.

Buy first car (expected age, 22) no, that didn't happen. I got bought my first car at 22.

First holiday with a partner (expected age, 23)...rapidly approaching 24 and I have no partner, safe to say I'm failing on this one!

Be a bridesmaid (expected age, 23)...never been a bridesmaid and no chances of that in the future.

Rent on your own (expected age, 24)...that's in 3 months time...I highly doubt it! I need to seriously learn to manage my money first, plus I don't fancy living on my own anyhoo.

Get engaged (expected age, 25)...pretty sure I need a boyfriend for this to happen? That'll be a no then.

Rent with a partner (expected age, 25)...well these are making me feel kind of lonely...I don't have a bloomin partner!

Get married (expected age, 27)...that's in like 4 years time, let's not worry about that one.

Buy first flat (expected age, 27)...too far in the future for me to think right now!

Have first child (expected age, 28)...I'm pretty sure I can't fill the last lot of this list now.

Buy first house (expected age, 29)...I'll happily aim for this one!

Now it's your turn (really hoping someone will join in on this...someone...anyone pppllleeeaaaassseee), I wanna see your responses to the list. I wanna see how everyone else is doing. If you're failing that's absolutely fine, join the club or maybe you're totally passing the test of major milestones...I wanna hear if you're failing or passing, either way it doesn't really matter. I just thought this article was pretty interesting and totally worth sharing, minus the fact of I do actually think it's utter rubbish at the same time! I mean seriously though, who made up this milestone expected list? What these lists give is pressure, unnecessary pressure! What do you think?

anxiety does not define me...anymore!

I'm not going to lie and say it never completely defined me, for a few years it did. I used to really avoid things because I'd feel anxious. I'd let the feeling control me. I'd feel anxious most days, feeling normal was no longer a feeling for me. The new 'normal' was feeling sick and having panic attacks on a regular basis, that normal wasn't a feeling I wanted to stick around. Thankfully over the years that feeling has gradually disappeared. I don't remember an exact day when I began to feel anxious so much and I also don't remember when I started to feel less anxious.

I spent a good few years feeling completely defined by anxiety, like there was nothing else to me. Like I had nothing about me, feeling sick and panic attacks were taking over. I wanted so much to have a 'normal' life, normal is so different for everyone. I wanted to be able to leave the house without that sick feeling or the panic lurking ready to pounce. I wanted so badly to do things that others took for granted.

Things didn't get easier for me by choice, the feelings didn't just disappear by sitting around and hoping they'd go away. Things got easier because I pushed myself, little things at a time. I'd gone from being pretty independent to an extremely nervous, anxious person. I rebuilt myself and my life.

Overtime I eventually realized that there is so much more to me than my illness. Anxiety is going to be a part of me for all my life I'm guessing. It'll come and go, thankfully now it stays away for a lot more than it stays. Anxiety, let's stay that way please.

I began blogging as an escape, from my own thoughts but all I could seem to write about was my health, my troubles, my worries, whatever was going around in my head really. It was my place to express myself, a place I could write away without judgement. I'm glad I started blogging and I recommend it to anyone. Talking about our problems makes them seem so much more manageable. Plus getting it out of your head gives it less control over you. Now even I can see a difference by looking at my blog posts. I can see there is more to me than my health and I can safely say hand on heart, anxiety does not completely define me anymore!

Scream, the tv series!

It feels like forever since I've sat down and wrote, just blogged away so I'm back today. To share with you, my new found love for a TV series. Forget about Pretty Little Liars, Scream is completely blowing Pretty Little Liars out of the water...in my opinion anyway!

I'm still a fan of Pretty Little Liars, yes even after a slightly disappointing ending to the 'A' discovery. The excitement before the episodes soon started to drop, I stopped getting excited about them. I was going to cancel my Netflix membership since it had been left for a good few months without being used but I've since made a new discovery on there... SCREAM.

Let me tell you what I know about Scream...it's not an awful lot but I'll share it with you anyway. Scream is a TV series based on the movie Scream (I've never watched it, maybe I should do since I've been really enjoying the TV series). Netflix claims it to be a Netflix Original Series, but it was first aired over on MTV in America so I don't know anything about that but I do know is it is fantastic!

Four reasons why I've really enjoyed Scream so far...

1. It's a brilliant, fast paced TV series, every single episode left me wanting more. Thank you Netflix for not making me wait weeks for a new episode!

2. After 10 episodes (that's the whole first series on Netflix), you discover who the killer is...not after 100 of episodes, hours of wasted time. Even after the discovery you are still left questioning more behind the killers story and other characters involvement.

3. It's perfect rainy day, winter weather entertainment. Yes, get into your comfies, grab your duvet, blanket, snacks, drinks and watch the hell out of this series! The time I've spent watching this hasn't felt like wasted time at all.

4. Serious eye candy...eye candy that didn't get murdered. Hallelujah!

Not my photo, I found it on Google...seriously crushing over him right now!

If reason 4 doesn't make you want to get watching Scream, I really don't know what will! :P

Have you watched Scream? the movie or TV series? What do you think?

one year, twelve goals...October update

2015 is almost over, scary thought that another year has almost flown by.

I've finally found time to sit and blog, hoorayyyy!

Today/tonight, I'm going to look back over the past few months and see how much progress (or little progress) I've made with the goals I set at the beginning of the year for myself. *ppppssssssttt* if you click beginning of the year for myself it'll send you to the original post, as if by magic.

On with the post, goals and progress so far...

1. Meet atleast 3 online friends.
Jamie, Dave & Pep...3 friends met, goal complete! Read all about it if you like, over....here!

2. Attend one or more concerts.
Goal is complete, I've attended 2 (Olly Murs and The Vamps) oh, and a half. It would of been 3 and a half by the end of the year but I'm not going to see One Direction now, they just aren't the same as a four piece.

3. Save more money than I spend.
I'm getting there on this one, I'm questioning when I buy stuff a lot more now so that's progress, right?

4. Take a weekend break.
No, none booked either. I really want to go visit Jamie, Dave & Pep but London?! Oh, it scares me! Would it be very anxiety friendly? We'll see...one day.

5. Read one book every month.
I'd read 7 on my last update and since then I've read 3 more. I'm on track, 10 books read and we're currently in the tenth month of the year. I've read Beautiful Ever After by Katie Piper (read all about her books and what I think in the post I wrote here), Paper Towns by John Green (started off good but ended up being a little bit of a flump for me) and the most recent book I've read is Eeny Meeny by M.J. Arlidge (I finished this at about half 5 this morning when I woke up and couldn't sleep, I'll be blogging about this one without a doubt)!

6. Tackle the stigma surrounding mental health more.
Ongoing goal, speaking about it is certainly one of the ways I'm currently tackling it. Tomorrow at work I'm actually planning on having a chat with my boss about my mental health cos I'm struggling a little at the minute, honesty is the best policy right?

7. Drink more water.
Yeah, I'm doing this. More water, less fizzy pop.

8. Spread my blogging wings more.
I think my blogging wings are coming close to forgetting how to move. I'll try to change that though. I've got a few posts in my head for the next few weeks, it's just finding time to sit and waffle...I mean write, sit down and write them.

9. Keep my diary up to date.
What diary?..enough said.

10. Cook more meals.
No, not at all. Slightly failing.

11. Enquire more about braces.
The thought is still in my mind, it has been for a good couple of years now. I've found a private dentist that do invisalign so I'm thinking about booking an appointment for a chat. Have you seen invisalign? Seriously those things are amazing, if I did go down the invisalign route I'd without a doubt blog my way through it.

12. Move...more.
Ongoing goal. I've started doing blogilates, it's so much fun. Admittedly it makes you ache the next day or two but it's totally worth it.