uh oh, I kinda got a little scared & deleted my previous post...OOPPSSS!

On Tuesday I took to my little blog you are currently reading to vent, to express myself but last night I found myself deleting the post. I didn't think it would be gone forever, surely there is a magic way to bring it back?! It appears not, but I've come to terms with that now.

 

I hit the delete button cos I got scared, what if I wrote some thing that comes across as about someone in particular (more than likely the case mind you) & they see it. My blog isn't a place to bitch at all. I use it as a place to just express my thoughts out into the open, that was the exact reason I created my blog. But since I now have followers & a face to the blog it scares me a little bit. Should I be scared about it? I really don't want to be at all & I don't think I should be either.

 

Maybe, I'll try & waffle away again at what had upset me. Tuesday night I just found myself crying, crying for what felt like such a ridiculous reason. My mind felt so messed up after some thing that happened over the past couple of weeks. I just felt so empty inside, I felt like I'd lost my sparkle & to be honest my self worth. I was doubting myself as a person. I've often done that over the past four/five years since I work for my parents cos nobody else will employ me...real confidence booster that is, oh wait...no it really isn't! If I didn't have my parents I'd be screwed! That is why I'm hoping to try & create something I can call my own. My blog is certainly something I'm extremely proud to call my own without a doubt! It isn't the most read blog out there, it doesn't have a thousand followers but what it does have is true content, a very loyal following & it gives me a real sense of pride.

 

I really don't want to be scared to hit the publish button anymore. I love when I receive a comment saying that they can really relate to me through my blog. That is exactly what I want, I want people to read my blog & be able to relate. To not feel alone in anything they may be going through.

 

I'm just waffling now but I guess I got the thoughts out of my head & on to paper, so to speak...well onto computer screen :) I'm going to sign off this post now but I want to leave you with two reminders.

 

It's OK not to be OK

 

&

 

It's OK to cry

♥

I'm going to leave you with them two sayings. I hope you are all well & learn from my mistake...don't go pressing that delete button on impulse. Stop & think about it, once it's gone...it's gone! Unless someone knows of a way, other than the half a dozen attempts I've tried already.

I'm working on a really lovely blog post at the minute, really enjoying it. I'm doing bits at a time, it might be up tomorrow actually...watch this space folks!

As always thanks for reading my chatter,
Anna ♥