do it yourself, an alternative to pumpkin carving...

At the end of this week it'll be Halloween & I've decided to create two different crafty posts to share with you. The first one will be this alternative pumpkin one & the second will be a nail post, it'll be up in a couple of days hopefully. I'm going to fit it inbetween work, house work & chilling.

Last year I thought it might been a fun idea to carve a pumpkin, I'd never done it growing up so I wanted to see what all the fuss was about. It is safe to say I wont be rushing to carve another pumpkin again, the smell & the feel....yuck!

 

This year I've done things a little different. I decided to transform my pumpkin...

 

 

I'm not going to pretend it was all my idea, it wasn't. I got inspiration from both Louise from Sprinkle of Glitter & Lauren Conrad. After watching Louise's video 'Halloween Toddler Crafts' & seeing the glitter pumpkin, also really liking the Halloween night light...great job as always Louise! :)

 



 

Then I spotted this on my instagram feed...

 

 

Add the two inspirations together & I created my little glittery pumpkin mummy with googly eyes! It's so simple to create so I thought I would share it with you...

 

 

 

 

You will need:

- a pumpkin

- a bin bag

- glue

- glue spreader

- masking tape

- glitter

- googly eyes

- bandages

- a few safety pins (only could find one at the start when I took the photo)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Firstly let's cover our work surface with the bin bag, the glitter can be pretty messy & using a bin bag will save time afterwards cleaning. Plonk your pumpkin in the middle & get ready for the next part.

 

 

Using your masking tape (or whoevers masking tape it is if you've just used someone elses...I used my mums & got moaned at afterwards, oooopppss! It was apparently her best masking tape, who knew?! She couldn't stay mad looking at the cuteness of the finished thing!) Create any size rectangular shape you like really, it's going to be mainly covered by the bandages anyway.

 

 

I made it fairly large so I could cover some of the edges with the bandage & still know I'd be able to have enough of the face showing. Next thing to do is add the glue & the glitter, this is when the glue spreader comes in handy...nobody wants messy fingers!

 



I used the masking tape to prop the pumpkin up so I could spread the glitter without it falling straight off,  this was clearly the point that got the masking tape covered in glitter...sorry mum!

 

Next thing to do is wait around 10 minutes, for the glue to dry a little bit & then peel off the masking tape. Now you should be left with something like this...

 

 

Oooppsss, the glue was still running a little bit...don't worry if that happens, it's going to get covered anyway. Get your bandages & start covering your pumpkin (one bandage at a time) however you like, there is no right or wrong way...you just do it however you want. I made sure I went around the whole pumpkin though, to cover the base too. Once you've done safety pin your bandage in place. I only ended up using two safety pins for the whole thing (one pin for each bandage).

 

 

Once you've covered your pumpkin, turned it into a mummy & are pleased with it, it's time to glue on your googly eyes. I decided to go for two different sizes, you can do whatever you like. Now you're glittery pumpkin mummy with googly eyes is complete!

 



Choose somewhere to proudly display your pumpkin & wait for the compliments to roll in (hopefully!) Oh, don't forget to gather your bin bag together & throw it away too! TA DA, easy peasy cleaning! There should be no mess what so ever. :)

I hope you've enjoyed this little crafty post, I really do love creating them. Have you ever tried something different instead of carving your pumpkin? Let me know, I'd love to hear about your ideas & creations too!

♥
 

boobs, boobs, boobs

Slightly unsure why my hands look so weird but hey, I coppafeel...do you?!

This month (October) is Breast Cancer Awareness Month, I don't really feel you can just only raise awareness for something for one month. You need to be raising awareness the entire year, twelve whole months.

 

I'd absolutely love to be able to be involved in physically raising awareness but right now I don't know if I could so instead I've decided to write a blog post again, about CoppaFeel. *pppssst* click Coppafeel & it'll take you to their site...you won't regret it. Actually in a way this is physically raising awarenesss, I'm physically sat writing this post to share with you.

I feel CoppaFeel is an absolutely incredible charity, set up by Kris & Maren (Kris's twin sister). It isn't my story to tell so you'll have to go over to their site & check it all out for yourself! I'm just creating this post to introduce you to the amazing charity if you don't know about them already!

excuse the really bad quality but...COPPAFEEL nails!!! certainly will get a conversation going, even if it is because they are so badly painted. :P

Their latest campaign is called #WhatNormalFeelsLike. Let's be honest, how are you going to spot any changes if you don't know what normal feels like for you?

Doughy would be the word I'd use to describe my boobs.

If you were asked to describe in one word your boobs, what would you say? Big or small, isn't an option. How do they really feel? Get to know them & then you will be able to tell what is normal for you!

Girls & boys, love your boobs!

♥

I'm not going to fill you in with all the facts but honestly head to CoppaFeels website & educate yourself. Educate yourself, educate your family, educate your friends.

Let's get talking about boobs & beating breast cancer sooner!


Who of you can honestly say they coppafeel? If so let's get talking. Either leave me a comment or send me a tweet. What does normal feel like for you?!

♥

p.s. Kris or Maren if you are reading this I'd absolutely LOVE to meet you both one day. I wish you all the luck in the world that CoppaFeel continues to grow & reach so many more people. To both of you & everyone at boob hq (I'm sure that's what you guys call it) I just want to say you are doing an amazing job! Keep doing what you're doing & being you! X


goodbye Sunday sharing, it's not you...it's me

If you're new around here you might not know about Sunday sharing. Sunday sharing is basically a post I do every Sunday, which includes me sharing something I'm enjoying/ I've enjoyed. But I've come to the conclusion that myself & weekly blog series don't last. Every week for me is a little different & sometimes I just don't have time on a Sunday to create a post, so I'll usually create the post during the week & then share it on Sunday. I don't want to be blogging like that, don't get me wrong I'm not slating anyone who does blog like that, we all have our own ways. But for me, blogging is being in the moment...creating the post & hitting publish almost straight away (after rereading for spelling mistakes a few times).

 

I'm still going to be creating posts (of course!) but they will probably just be more random & during the week...that suits me just fine! :)

 

I'm still keeping my monthly series, monthly movie. I'm currently trying to finish reading Gone Girl as quick as I can since I'm going to the cinema on Wednesday to watch it, slightly scared about it since the rating is 18...I don't even know if I've ever watched an 18, nevermind an 18 on the big screen. I'll without a doubt be getting asked for ID, if I don't I'll be pretty gutted.

Not a huge fan of leaving blog posts without pictures, but since I don't have one today I'll add in the Gone Girl trailer. Have you been to see it, have you read the book or maybe both?

 

Let me know & wish me luck? I don't really do these kind of films but it's good to try something different every now & then.
 

♥

say what you wanna say & let the words fall out...

Yes, I did just quote Sara Bareilles...

 

 

I'm absolutely a teeny tiny bit in love with this song. The lyrics are very inspiring & now I've seen the official video I'm even more impressed & inspired!

 

 

After random ranting last night & then kind of regretting it today, I've done that before & hit delete...I regret deleting that post now. After chatting to a supportive friend of mine who has reassured me that I shouldn't delete it & she said she loves my honesty (how can I delete it when someone admires my honesty?!). I'd just be being fake if I only posted positive happy things all the times, things aren't always positive in life...I do always try my hardest to be positive but sometimes we have to let those negatives out too.

 

I think we all need to remember that behind every blog is a person, not a robot...a person, with feelings, emotions, mixed reactions, different personalities, different skills, different behaviours, everything is different. We are just humans behind a screen, using our blogs as our creative spaces & outlets.

 

♥

blogging out my thoughts...on my (work) life right now

When I first started blogging almost two years ago, I had zero readers, zero followers, zero comments...I got no reaction, no responses...I didn't put my blog out there to anyone. I just used it as my space to vent, get out whatever was in my head. I know a few people struggle to be so open & honest on their blogs, but I really don't. For me there is no other way of blogging, I started blogging to express myself & I can honestly say I still do that to this day. This is just going to be a random rambly waffle on kind of post. If you don't want to read it, then don't...simple as that really :) If you do want to read it, go ahead. :)

 

I'm 22, living at home with my parents, no sign of any future relationships, no interest in even starting any relationships actually. I've just got a new job, a 4 hour contract. I'm not ungrateful for this, I just don't feel like it is enough. I'd debate if I was ready for this or if I could even cope but 4 hours a week really isn't enough. 16 hours is part time...4 hours is a quarter of that, to me it just seems a little bit mehhh :/ I don't have a clue what to do, when I'm there I really do enjoy it. When I'm not there I'm not a huge fan :/ maybe I've not given it enough of a chance? But 4 hours? Maybe I need to look into something a little more...consistent? (is that the right word to use?). I had more hours to work with my parents. I wanted a different job from working with my parents, living with family & working with family can be an awful lot to handle...no escape as such. But I also need to be able to fund for myself. I've just worked out how much I'll earn in a standard week of 4 hours, £26...

 

Do I push myself out there even more & hope for something else to come along? I really don't think I'll be able to cope with the rush of Christmas shoppers. I genuinely have no idea what to do.

 

End of ramble post, nothing else to ramble on about right now so I'll leave it at that.

 

If you have any words of wisdom or anything to say, please send your words my way, thanks! :)

♥

Glitterati by Barry M ♥

Have any of you picked up any of the latest nail paint collection, 'Glitterati' by Barry M? It is absolutely top secret no secret that I love nail varnish, hence why I only actually blog about nail varnish (make up wise obviously). I'm clearly not the next top beauty blogger in the making! :P

 

I'm almost certain by the end of this post, you'll be wanting atleast one of the colours...if not all six! (Sorry to your purses girls!) I'm going to share with you samples of what the nail paints look like alone & what they look like with another one of Barry Ms nail paints as the base.

 

 

left to right - Catwalk Queen, Fashion Icon, Rockstar, Socialite, Starlet, VIP.

 

 Wouldn't it be lovely if you could just paint one coat & your nails looks exactly like the liquid in the bottle. Unfortunately that isn't the case, but don't worry...it can be achieved. I'm going to show you how by using my other nail paints in the Barry M collection (no, not sponsored or anything...just slightly addicted).

 

 

 

I've recently order a few nail art wheels, pretty cheap on Amazon for those of you looking for them (thanks Jamie for the heads up!). On to the collection & creating the looks...

 

 

Catwalk Queen

+

Gelly Hi-shine, Greenberry

♥

 

 

 Fashion Icon

+

Gelly Hi-shine, Damson

♥

 

 

Rockstar

+

Gelly Hi-shine, Watermelon

♥

 

Starlet

+

Gelly Hi-shine, Pink Punch 

♥

 

Socialite

+

Bright Purple

♥



 

VIP

+

Matte, Malibu

♥

 

Usually when I'm creating & sharing nail varnishes on here, I tend to take photos of the colours actually on my nails. This post is going to be a little different though, no hands or nails are involved in the making of this post! Ok, well hands are involved...how do you think I'm typing this? ;)

 

Honestly, the colours of the Glitterati can be made to be the same as the liquid in the bottle (yeahhh...I'm mentioning that again! I really love Barry M for that!). Of course you don't have to use the exact same polishes I've used, try some of a similar shade or even a completely different colour you think will work. To create the same effect as what is in the bottle I just did two coats of the base (coloured paint) & then just one thick coat of the Glitterati. :)

 

I'm an absolute sucker for nail varnish that glitters & shimmers, if you are too then you'll really love Glitterati I'm sure! Barry M, you've done goooooooodddd!!!

 

 

I absolutely love this collection (have I said that already?!). Barry M is genuinely my all time favourite brand (no, I'm not being sponsored by Barry M, even though if I was for nail paints I'd save a fortune ;) I'm going to keep my eyes open for their competitions!)...I dart start to it whenever I'm in Boots or Superdrug. It's got to the point now though where the ladies in my local boots now how much & how often I'm buying nail varnish.....ooopppsssssiieeeee! ;)

 

 

I decided to try something a little different with this post, I adjusted the photo sizing to almost fit the post...I didn't want them all too big, hence why some are a little smaller. I don't have a big, big girl camera neither so the quality could be better but still, I think I've done a pretty good job! I really enjoyed myself & that is what is important. :)

 

 

Have you treated yourself to any of the Glitterati nail paints?! Let me know if you have, which one is your favourite? Also have you tried any of Barry M's other new ranges? I've bought a few of the limited edition ones lately, I mean...come on, who can resist. Plus Boots points have to be spent on yourself, right?

 

♥

 

p.s. this blog post creating (the chalk photo at the start) ended with the street I live on getting drawn on...by a few of the kids who live on our street. I mean try explaining to them what you are actually doing! My best explanation was 'I'm just being weird & creative'...I would much rather be weird & creative than 'normal'.

 

ooooh & also, if there happens to be any tiny mistakes during this post please excuse me. :) I'm currently wrapped up in my duvet with two extra blankets, yes that would be a duvet & two extra blankets! Feeling a little bit sorry for myself, cuddle anyone? I promise not to let my leaking tap of a nose get on you, honest! :)

Sunday Sharing... The Good Girl by Mary Kubica

Another Sunday...where does the week go? I've just come back in from an afternoon of creating future blog posts, mainly just taking photos & getting creative in the meantime. I'll be starting to put together them posts later tonight or maybe even tomorrow. I started this post about two weeks ago, almost straight after I'd finished the book & haven't felt a right time to hit publish...slightly weird? But here it is, better late than never.

 

I'm not one of the world's quickest readers, at all. It has taken me just over a month to read this book but I've bloomin' well enjoyed it! You know the saying 'never judge a book by it's cover', who created this saying? How many of you judge a book by it's cover. I certainly do & I'm sure alot of people do, I mean it's the first thing you see...

An awful lot of my books are lovey dovey, happy ending kind of stories. I'm a sucker for a Nicholas Spark book. But I recently got to the point where I was like, "I'm fed up of love stories. I want to read something a little different". It might of come from reading Nicholas Sparks, Safe Haven. That wasn't his typical kind of story, but I seriously loved reading it. It had some action in, don't want to say too much about it. So I'm thinking maybe that was what made me change my mind anyway.

Safe to say looking at both the front cover & the back of The Good Girl, it is certainly not going to be a lovey dovey kind of story. The front cover always draws me in & this was certainly an eye catching front cover (good job Mary!). As you can tell I spotted the book, read the blurb & gave it a shot!

I've never gone by book recommendations or book reviews when I choose a book to read, cos everyone is different when it comes to choices of books & their opinions. I'd much rather read a book, gain my own opinion from it & then share it with others.

But since I share a fair bit of my life online I thought I'd share with you my recent read. I don't want to say too much about it. If you like books with a darker side of life but with a twist then this book could certainly be a read for you.

I'm not a huge fan of chapters in books, as in chapter 1,2,3,4,5,6....you get the picture. I prefer it when the chapters are either a diary entry or just based on one character. Throughout The Good Girl the chapters are based on a character, telling the story from their view, both before the big event in the story & after too.

Would I recommend this book to you? Absolutely!

After reading it & then reading the front saying about 'fans of Gone Girl will embrace this'. I thought it was only right I picked up a copy of Gone Girl & give it a read. I'm almost half way through it & I'm really enjoying it. Hoping to finish the book before it stops showing in cinemas too, otherwise I'll have to just wait for the DVD.

Have you read any good books lately?
I'd love to hear about it.

♥

monthly movie - sex tape

*rewinds time a couple of weeks back* yes, yes...we are still in September!

 

Ok, you've got me...we aren't but let's pretend we are?

 

The last time I went to the cinema was at the end of August when I watched what if...that feels like such a long time ago now though! So much has happened since then, it's crazzyyyyy!

This time last week (I started writing this last Wednesday...it's now Monday, oooppss!) I went to the cinema again...shocking news to add in here, I didn't go on my own! :O I went with my lovely friend Rachel. A little story for you now...we had wanted to go watch sex tape since the day it was released (it wasn't long after what if, if I remember rightly) but we managed to go & watch it the day before it was no longer showing at the cinema near to us. We had the choice of 4:45 or 9:15, Rachel has a husband & kids so we opted for the 9:15 showing...even though it was very close to our bedtimes haha. Orange Wednesday is always the way forward at the cinema so we decided one of us would pay for snacks & drinks, the other for the tickets. Rachel paid for the snacks & drinks first then I paid the tickets...expect the cinema had to cancel that screening....gutted, wasn't the word! So we decided to go for another film, what we did on our holiday...or something along those lines. On our way to the screen the film was being showed in a lot of people were coming out of a screen (the screen where sex tape was meant to be, but had been cancelled cos of a live show...the live show had actually finished before sex tape was meant to show). We went into the screen where the film (the holiday one) was 5 or 10 minutes in & to be honest we just wasn't really feeling the film at all. It had a more tv programme vibe to it than a movie vibe so I disappeared 'to the toilet', I didn't go to the toilet at all...I went to the main part of the cinema where you pay & get food & drink from, to see if there was any chance they could give us some kind of offer for the next day (the last day they were showing sex tape), the lovely lady phoned up the main man/woman of the cinema & explained the situation. The last words that came out of her month were...'screen 4, 5 minutes...there going to put it on for you'...well I seriously couldn't thank them enough & I couldn't run quick enough to tell Rachel neither! We both hurried along into screen 4 & got comfy ready for the film to start! WOW, sorry...that really wasn't a little story!

Have you seen the trailer for sex tape?

No, no, no...no you haven't?! STOP RIGHT THERE!!!

Have you watched the trailer?

you may continue now...

I'd been told that this film had got bad reviews but I didn't let that stop me watching it, you can't really let that stop you cos everybodys taste in movies is different. But in my opinion...

Sex tape is one of those films where you are sat watching it & when it ends you don't realise you've been sat there for like an hour and a half. I loved the whole story being based around 'the cloud' (iCloud)..."nobody understands the cloud, it's a f**king mystery!". Absolutely hilarious!

Would I recommend the film to you? Yes, yes I would! If you want to watch a comedy this one is a must see.

Have you seen any new films recently?

I'm wanting/hoping to go & see gone girl, I'm still reading the book...three weeks down the line? :/ I'm not a fast reader!

 

♥

Sunday sharing...ed sheeran album, x deluxe edition & another achievement?!

WHAT?!?! THE WEEKEND IS OVER!!!

 

The weekend wouldn't be complete without me sharing something with you today, I've only just created this series but in the same breathe it feels like I've done it for ages...slightly weird? :/ mmm, anyway...

 

I'm only sharing one thing with you today, well one item...I'm also sharing an achievement with you too.

 

An album I've been loving for the past few months, well since it came out really...don't remember when it was released but I don't regret buying this album at all!

 

 

 ED SHEERAN X DELUXE EDITION , this is without a doubt my driving soundtrack right now. Ed Sheeran is such an incredibly talented artist. I have a lot of love for him & his music, come to think of it though now...I'm not sure if I follow him on twitter, shock horror?!

 

There is without a doubt a fair few songs on this album for you to look out for. I just love Ed's voice & how his songs are so relatable & genuine too. Have you heard his latest single? 'thinking out loud'...the video is beautiful, I'm going to add the youtube video in for it so you can have a little listen (just incase you haven't heard of ed or this song...where have you been hiding?!)

 

 

♥

 

Next part of this post, I've achieved something else this week! Back in June or July, I can't remember which month now I had attempted to attend a bloggers meet up. I managed to drive all the way to the town it was being held in, turned into a side road cos I was beginning to panic & just burst into tears...that trip ended quickly as I turned back round & came straight back home. But yesterday afternoon I was going to go to the same town with my godmum & I decided it would be a good idea for me to try again...cut a story short, I bloomin' well did it! All the way there, through the town, into the car park & all the way home! Ooooh yessss! I'm so proud of myself for doing it.

 

I'm also really proud of myself for managing to shop a little too, even though I did start having a panic attack in h&m. I stayed with it & it eventually eased. My thought pattern is certainly improving because as soon as I used to panic my automatic response was 'I need to get home now'. But not nomore, that wasn't my response yesterday & it wasn't my response at work on Thursday neither.

 

Things are improving guys, it's fantastic! I'm so pleased.

 

♥

world mental health day

 

 

Today is world mental health day, so I thought I'd put together a little post. A little post to share some places with you, use them as you like...to get support if you need it...to share with someone who might be suffering...to get an understanding of mental health...to speak to someone if you are feeling alone.

 

Mind

 

Time To Change

 

Samaritans 

 

♥

The scariest part of mental health is that anyone can suffer, no matter how rich you are, no matter how famous you are, no matter how successful you are, no matter how popular you are, no matter how confident you are...literally anyone can be affected by mental health problems.

We can't all possibly be fully understanding of every possible mental health problem out there but we can sure as hell try to get more of an understanding & be supportive of others.

One piece of advice I'd give to someone suffering is to speak out, please don't suffer in silence. You don't necessarily have to speak to someone you know...Samaritans can be there if you need them. People online can also be extremely supportive too (in my opinion). You could even set up a blog, you don't have to blog publically...you can remain anonymous. Amy is a fabulous example of this! I've a lot of love & respect for Amy.

Blogging has without a doubt helped me, from the days of starting out blogging with nobody reading them up til now. I can tell such a difference in myself over the past few years, my mental health has improved so much. Blogging has given me such a focus in life, it is now a hobby of mine.

♥

I've seen a few videos floating around today for world mental health day, this is my contribution...in written form instead of video form.

Just want to state, I'm not a professional in anyway...I'm just a girl living with a mental health problem.

what goes up must come down & that's ok!

If you can't tell by the name, something happened yesterday & I'm here to share it with you because you know what...mental health is something that is ok & it is absolutely fine to talk about it, be open & honest. Let's make this world a little easier & bash the stigma on its nasty head.

 

Yesterday I had work & the night before I didn't feel overly great, a temperature & a little bit of a funny head. I was in two minds about going to work but I powered on. I'm starting to think those feelings were part of my anxiety. Yesterday my shift was 11 til 3, I always turn up about 5 or 10 minutes before hand...so I went upstairs in the staff room to take my coat & scarf off and to put away my bag in a locker. I was alone, what happened next?

 

I just burst straight in to tears, my automatic thought in my head at that time was "I can't do this, this is too much". Maybe 15 minutes later after a few more tears, racing heart & an nasty sick feeling...I was absolutely fine & sat explaining a little bit more to the deputy manager. The only two people who knew about my little friends (anxiety & panic) weren't in work yesterday so nobody knew. I explained to my deputy manager afterwards & she was absolutely lovely, really understanding, caring & wanted me to tell her a little bit more about it. Seriously can't thank her enough for being the way she is, cos if she wasn't so accepting it would made it even harder.

 

Once the feelings had passed & I'd spoke to my deputy manager I was ready to go again. I managed the full shift with no problems at all. My high temperature had gone & so had the funny head...I wonder if that was all linked, who knows?

 

The whole point of this post was to just share the story with you, to prove that yes sometimes things go downhill but that is absolutely fine. Don't be scared of it happening, just accept it cos it is ok for it to happen. It's ok to talk to people too, sharing my feelings & thoughts always makes me feel so much better. Always remember aswell, what goes up must come down...but also what goes down must also come back up again. ♥

a massive achievement for me...

In life different things happen to different people. Things happen that form you into the person you are today. Sometimes it breaks you, sometimes it completely destroys you, sometimes it makes you hit rock bottom, sometimes it makes you stronger, sometimes it makes you re-evaluate what is important in life, what matters & what really doesn't.

 

Over the past two years I've seen a noticeable change & have experienced myself grow so much as a person. No two peoples lives are the same, not everybody experiences everything somebody else might. Not everyone will struggle with their mental health in their teens/early twenties. But some people will, I was one of those people. Over the past four years I've learnt how to deal with my anxiety & panic attacks. I haven't been bothered about relationships, going out getting drunk, finding a job to work every day of the week every hour given. I've been so wrapped up in my anxiety & panic attacks, they had a very tight grasp around me. Luckily now I've wiggled my way out of it's control, now I'm in control.

 

Looking back over the past four years I remember so much...attending doctors appointments completely unaware what was going off, struggling to stay in the waiting room of the doctors surgery, crying to myself just wanting to feel better, comparing my life to others, wishing I could just be normal & do normal things, wishing people would understand, attending therapy sessions, attempting to go out & it ending within minutes of arriving cos I just had to get home, walking into a shop & rushing back out the exit as soon as I could, not leaving the house without mints or soothers, walking back & forth to the nearest bus stop & not being able to get on the bus, getting into my parents shop & being hit by an unknown wave of fear & panic, not being able to go into town during the day, staying well & truly in my comfort zone (my house), thinking I'd never be able to get a job, fearing never being able to drive, fearing never being able to be independent.

But today I want to just share what I've managed to do over the past four years...that I didn't think I'd be able to do, things that I doubted I'd be able to do again...

Drive...I managed to do driving lessons, pass my theory test, pass my driving test & I'm still driving on my own now. Independent? Yes, yes I am.

Work...I started working for my parents which was a casual thing, just as and when, no pressure if I wasn't feeling up to it. I still remember at the beginning when I couldn't manage to work though, I couldn't even stay in the shop let alone work... the feelings of panic & fear were so strong. My mum would drive me home, sometimes I'd just get home & burst into tears...both out of sadness & frustration. But a little voice in the back of my head kept reminding me to try again, there is always time to try again. I guess really I just kept working at it & managed to do it. Now I've managed to help at a few other local shops, yet nobody has given me a contract. But...WAIT! Now I have a contract! It's official, I'm working for someone other than my parents!

This photo captures something that means so much to me. It's something so simple to some, but such a massive deal for me!

It makes me feel like part of a team, part of a unit, part of something...somewhere I can now belong & call my own little work place. Not only does it make me feel part of something, I'm also wearing it like a medal. A medal, proof that things can change, things do eventually work out, things really can happen. Don't ever give up on something, ever! The girl writing this & wearing her lanyard (totally called lanyard right?) is the same girl who at one point struggled to leave the house, remember that. You can do whatever you put your mind to, it just might take some time.

I'm not working in an office neither which I thought I'd be wanting to do, when I left school I just knew I liked computers. But now I have an absolute love for blogging, I feel like blogging has replaced my urge to work in an office on a computer. After working in my parents shop though I discovered that I enjoyed working with people..customers. There is so many interesting characters out there, I absolutely love it! I love chatting away to people too, so I mean what better kind of job for me than shop work. I don't think it's a secret neither that I love clothes so could there be a better job for me right now? I think not!

I can leave the house on my own, at one point I couldn't. I got to a point of not wanting to go out, getting to a point of having enough of going out & coming straight back home...I got to a point where I just gave up attempting to go out, becoming slightly housebound I'd say. I got to a point of automatically just saying no if I was asked out.

I can dog walk a lot further...I used to do the same route of dog walk to try & get back home as soon as I could. The odd times I'd feel so sick that I'd start to run so I could get home quicker. Now I don't do the same route, I can walk further, without having to worry about how long it would take me to get home...how quick I could get home, what route I would take.

I don't take mints & soothers out with me now...sounds slightly random but I genuinely couldn't do this. Mints and soothers were my safety behaviour, but not anymore. I don't check my bag or pockets to make sure I have any of them (yes I used to).

 

 

I'm going to leave it at that. Remember that you can always achieve what you put your mind to, yes it will take some time & an achievement is an achievement, no matter how big or small it is on the scale.

 

Have you achieved something recently?

Let me know, maybe?   :)  ♥

 

Sunday sharing...Barry M, glitterati 'fashion icon'

Ok, so maybe Sunday sharing will become more than a one off kind of post. I'm here again to ramble on...oh yeah! I'm going to share with you my love for Barry M's latest collection glitterati nail paint, today it's only going to be fashion icon since that is what I'm currently wearing & absolutely loving! Every time I look down at my nails I feel all happy inside. I was really well behaved & only bought one (read I totally didn't just behave & buy one, I bought the whole collection!)...

 

 

Since I've just started a new job in retail I was drew in by this one so yes, the rest is history! Now to share it...

 

 

Anything with sparkle makes life so much more happier, well I like to think so anyway. So when I saw the glitterati collection I just had to pick up one to try the whole collection, of course...boots have an offer on, just as a heads up! Who doesn't love an offer.

 

 

I'm no nail artist or pro in anyway, so please excuse the state of my painting! I'm pretty sure the glitterati paints are meant to go on top of a coloured base so I chose the classic paint, called Bright Purple.

 

 

In a way I feel like the photos make it look like the glitterati is more blue than purple but I think it is more purple, well it is as I'm typing this but get it in another light it looks blue. Nails with two different tones, we are on to a winner! :)

 

I absolutely LOVE it! I'm not usually a fan of purple nails but purple nails with glitter, I'm up for that!

 

Nothing else to share now, just wanted to share my love for this new paint with you...job done!

 

I'll be back shortly to create a post that will hopefully give someone hope & be proof that things can get better, they will get better. ♥

what I wore...to an 'interview' + I'm still in shock!!!

Still can't believe I actually have a job now, it all feels a little more real now since yesterday I had my induction...watching various dvds on health and safety, customers with disabilities & fire...answering questions in work booklets too. It's so crazy actually being back in the exact place I did my work experience eight years ago...EIGHT FLIPPIN' YEARS!!! Other than a few changes in staff nothing has changed at all, I have a very good feeling that I'm going to love it! (currently got the song from Annie going round in my head, you know when she gets adopted...can't get the lyrics right though so I wont attempt to sing it). What I'm not loving so much is the fact of it is a 4 hour contract, does that mean I'll only be working 4 hours every week?

 

After four years of being unsuccessful & struggling with my health, it still feels weird that someone other than my parents are allowing me to work for them. I'm going to feel like such a part of the team (well I hope I am anyway)! My contract is only 4 hours, but atleast I have my foot in the door. We can only hope it will increase but in the meantime I'll just ease myself in gradually.

 

Finding time to sit & blog seems to be a little bit of trouble at the minute, but tonight I'm going to throw together (I mean throw together in the nicest way possible!) an outfit post. I'm going to share with you what I wore for my 'interview' that wasn't really an interview more like a casual chat in the end.

 

Up until the Sunday before I didn't own a black dress, not a single one...I'm not even kidding you neither. So on the Sunday me & Tilly (my car) tootled off on our way on the hunt for a simple black dress. It wasn't as simple as I thought it would be! My mum was trying to get me to wear trousers for the interview, I went along with it but I ended up returning them beforehand because I'm just not a trouser wearer...at all! I think I've maybe worn them three or four times max since I've left school. Anyway, black dress mission....complete!

 

I managed to get 3 dresses, 2 black & 1 grey flecked kind of dress! The dress I wore on the day was from Asda & was an absolute bargain & is gorgeous too! Want to see it online? Let me have a look...I've found it...G21 Lace Sleeve Dress

 

Oooh, we've gone far too long without any pictures...I'll get adding them now!

 

The dress is kind of smock fitting, which can work really well but sometimes can make me look very frumpy (well feel it anyway) so I decided to just add one of my little tan belts to add some shape.

 

 

I wasn't planning on wearing a coat or thing to cover my arms at all so I decided to throw a scarf on. This scarf is a recent purchase from Matalan. It really brightened my outfit up a little (yes it is possible for grey to brighten up an outfit)!

 

I absolutely love the lace sleeves! Here, check them out for yourself...they really do make the dress simple yet stylish.

 

 

I wore my dress with a pair of black tights, I think they were my 100 denier tights from Matalan...I bloomin' love that place! I actually based my outfit around my boots.

 

I was thinking about creating a post separate for the boots themselves but I don't really think I will...totally just wrote that but I'm now thinking of ways I'll put the post together so maybe that will be created!

 

 In the meantime I'll just add a little sneaky peak of them in here but not mention where they are from or nothing...my lips are sealed! ;)

 

 

I don't think I've fallen in love with a pair of shoes as much as I have with these & my other new Chelsea boots!

 

Of course for an interview you need to have a smart looking handbag...until a few days before I didn't own one but I went for this one from Matalan.

 

 

The bag is available in both this colour & a grey. It can be found online here & is on offer at the minute. I'm pretty sure it is available in black too. The only thing I don't like about it is when I have it over my shoulder (my right one..do left handed people put theirs over their left shoulder? :/ mmmm, let me know?!) the zip isn't at the front next to me so it is an absolute cow to pop things in & out when I'm out & about. The sizing is great though.

 

I wore no jewellery other than a watch. Watches are in the jewellery section but are they classed as jewellery? Hmmm, I seem to have a few questions tonight.

 

 

Once I'd snapped these few photos I head out the door & to the 'interview'. I went to see my friend afterwards & she snapped this photo for me.

 

 

I love it!

 

If I had to caption it, it would more than likely be 'jumping for joy'!

 

Ok, I think I've done enough chitty chatting in this post. I'm going to head off to paint my nails. Watch this space, I may share my opinion with you on a few of Barry M's new releases.

 

If you are still here, thanks for reading!

♥