struggling a little & my goal for today...

Right, I'm not going to beat around the bush...I'm struggling a little at the minute, day to day life is getting a little bit too much. But I'm just going with the flow, trying to remain calm & relax when I can. When I first started blogging I blogged for me, I had no readers. I didn't even think I'd end up with any readers but here I am now with a loyal following, a group I'd class as friends. I just blogged whatever was bothering me, so I'm going to do just that now.

Over the past year though I have started to throw together some different kinds of posts because I want to be more than anxiety, I have other qualities too. So you'll now be able to find the occasional fashion post, a fair few nail posts, music posts, film posts, crafty posts...a real mixture of things I love & what is current in my life. Unfortunately today what is current is my struggle.

I've been struggling for the past two weeks, some days are better than others of course. Every day I manage to go out, even when I don't even need to. I just go out because I'm scared of going backwards, I don't want to go back to being at home most of the time. I'm a lot more in control of it now though actually but that thought of going backwards does keep creeping in, the little monkey!

Blogging out my feelings was the reason I started blogging & just by typing what I have so far has given me a feeling of relief. A weight has been lifted off my chest. This is why people need to try their best to get out what is bothering them, talk about whatever they need to.

I'm currently sat on my bed, trying not to make eye contact with the mess on the floor...the mess that feels like it is growing bigger & bigger because I just keep adding to it. It's only messy because I come home late in the day & really can't be bothered to put the stuff (mainly clothes infact) away. So my plan for today is to clear my room of mess & clutter.

My goal for today is...to be able to sit at my desk later on today & blog about a recent nail polish I bought. Right now I can hardly see the surface of the desk or actually sit on the chair, so now you know what I'm working with.

Well that was an extremely rambly post, probably makes no sense but I'm going to hit publish anyway. Hopefully see you later!

♥