Hey, let's talk about....independence

Image found on weheartit

Is there any better feeling than being independent?
Being able to complete something by yourself & being proud. If you ask me, I feel strongly about being independent. Being independent to me is both a goal & a dream. Right now I don't dream about finding prince charming, having children & a big house. No, right now I dream of being able to provide for myself, be independent, my own woman. I don't want to feel like I have to be part of a massive crowd to be a part of something. I can be myself & still be part of something, still have a part to play in life.

Now I look back, I haven't ever really actually had any dreams. Well not that I can remember anyway. But I do know that now my dream is to become independent, become my own woman. I don't want somebody to dictate what I do or how I do something. Part of this has actually come from past experiences of knowing that people really don't stick around forever. Don't get me wrong I do think people will stick in peoples lives forever, it all just depends on the person & probably the situation. I know I haven't stuck around in peoples lives forever, that is just the way life goes. We all do have those people in our lives who we can count on though. I don't think that being independent means you forget these people at all. Everybody has their own independence, some people have their independence taken away from them for awhile. With the help & constant support from loved ones I think we can all regain our independence.

 I'm going to focus on supporting myself because what better feeling is there than knowing you can do something by yourself? Knowing that even if you get knocked down, you can get back up on your own two feet & start fighting again. Don't get me wrong all the support in the world can be given but it is all down to ourselves. Nobody can change our lives & our future but ourselves.

Image found on weheartit

Life really is a fight, nobody comes out alive. But that doesn't mean we should just roll over or curl up in a ball & let the toughness of life decide how we spend our lives. I don't want to spend my life in fear, but can I control that fear in a quick decision of you know what....I'm not going to be scared anymore, I'm not going to live in fear. No, I can't change it overnight. It is a long process & so is becoming independent.

Being independent can be at completely different levels. It all needs to be worked towards realistically too, I won't just wake up tomorrow & be like you know what I think I'm going to rent my own flat, buy a car.. I won't think like that because I know full well that is not realistic for me at all, I don't have a fulltime job so how would I provide for myself? I really wouldn't.. I would struggle. So my current independent goal is to be able to manage going out on my own more, instead of going with someone.

A lot of people my age are probably living away from home, providing for themselves....are they struggling? who knows. I'm not going to compare myself to others anymore because the whole point of being independent is also being your own person, unique.... so I don't need to compare myself to others. No two peoples lives are on the same track, every single persons life is going at a different speed. We have obstacles thrown in our way for us to fight through & battle them.

I'd like to think a good few of you reading this can connect to this. I know there is a lot of you fighting some kind of battle, whether it be a physical battle &/or a mental battle, a battle with your own mind. I really want you all to know it doesn't matter what speed you live your life at all, what matters is that we all come out the other end stronger than ever. I really want you all to remember, whatever battle you are fighter....

Image found on weheartit

What does independence mean to you?
Let me know in the comments below.
If you felt a connection to this post let me know too.

Thanks so much for reading.
- Anna ♥

My Driving Journey - Lesson 35

This week I only had one lesson, my usual Tuesday slot was taken by a test & my instructor was off on Thursday since the last week has been half term. It felt so weird just having one lesson but this week is back to Tuesday & Thursday, yipeeeee!
Before I start with my lesson run down, I wanna know if anyone can help me. As you can see on my image above I added my URL, now my URL has changed but I don't actually know how to remove the old URL from the picture...any tips? Please let me know in the comments, thanks!
Monday 21st October
Since starting my lessons I have been waiting for rain & finally we got rain. I know a few people who hate driving in the rain but I was quite curious & eager to give it a go. I have to say, I don't really mind it to be honest. But out of all the things we could be doing in the rain, it had to be an emergency stop didn't it. Before being introduced to emergency stops I got chance to practice a 3 point turn, I managed that in 3 & didn't hit any kerbs...bonus!
Then after that we got to practice more emerging from junctions. I also got explained the 'show me, tell me' part of the test, I had heard of it but never been explained much about it really. I guess the clue is kind of in the name really. Up next was the emergency stop, it is so weird trying to stop quickly when really I've been so used to slowing down gradually. I had heard that like the instructor/examiner will hit the dashboard & then you are expected to stop. It was nothing like that, Sharon checked behind her & then when she was ready & knew it was safe, she would put her arm out in front of her with her hand up...imagine Spice Girls - Stop & you've got it about right..
stop right now, thank you very much I need somebody with a human touch, hey you always on the run gotta slow it down baby gotta have some fun....
& then obviously I have to stop the car wherever we are. I have to remember to hit my foot on the brake like I'm having a tantrum. The first couple of the times weren't great but once she told me to put my foot down harder, like having a tantrum it was better....the papers on the backseat all fell on the floor, so that must of been a good sign, right?
What did you think to emergency stops?
Let me know in the comments.
I really love hearing from you.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Sit Down Sunday - 27th October 2013

I've decided this week to do a little collage of some of the things I am grateful for/have enjoyed this week....
- advice & guidance from friends
- playing board games
- my thick winter duvet
- newly painted nails
- getting creative & doodling
- one direction's new song, the story of my life
- support & belief from so many different people
- my mums cooking
- bubble baths
- fresh air
Have you enjoyed anything this week?
What are you grateful for this week?
I'd love to hear from you, so feel free to leave me a comment below.
Thanks for reading
- Anna ♥

a waiting game....

tick, tock, tick, tock..
All I can think about is time passing, the waiting game will soon come to an end. I will know the decision made & my near future too..
Image found on weheartit
The waiting game fills me with both excitement & dread. The excitement of what is to come & dread if what I want to happen doesn't. Last week I had a job interview, well a casual one but still. Tuesday morning last week I wrote a cover letter for a job I had seen the night before & headed down to the shop to hand in my cover letter & CV. After that I had my driving lesson & when I returned back from my lesson there was a voicemail on our home phone. It was only the man from the shop I went in earlier with my CV asking if I could give him a call back. I phoned back as soon as I got home from my lesson. I was asked if I could get down for an interview/informal chat. In a manic rush I dashed down there & had my interview.
Anxiety was high but the interview/informal chat went really well. They were really impressed with my CV, the only negative they had was that I worked for someone else (I help my parents out whenever they need help). But I explained my situation so it was all good, better than good infact brilliant. I decided that since anxiety was such a big part of my life, I would be completely honest. They were so support & reacted exactly how I really hoped they would.
Originally I was meant to hear back last week but then I received an email at the end of the week saying they had a few more people to interview over this week & I would hear as soon as. I think it's great when people do that, atleast everyone knows where they stand. I'm still waiting to hear....Every time the phone rings I run to it & every time the post arrives I run to pick it up.
I really, really, really, reallyyyyyy hope that I get this job. It will be so great for me, I will be beyond grateful. I know it wont be easy to get used to it at all, it will be tough but it will be totally worth it.
I thought I would share my experience this past two week with you guys.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Hey, let's talk about....routine

I love thinking about something to waffle on about on a Wednesday, a little bit of a midweek discussion & thoughts flying around in my head..
My thought literally popped in to my head this morning at about 8 o'clock when I was messaging my lovely friend Ally (hey Ally, I know you'll be reading this) & I thought you know what I have a fair bit to say about the subject so here goes....
Image found on weheartit
Sometimes a break from our routine is exactly what we do need but what happens when that break goes on a lot longer than you expected? Once I had finished my NVQ in 2009 I planned to have a little break, in all honesty thinking I would be able to get straight back in to everything..oh boy, how wrong was I. I thought oh I'll take a little time out & then get into a job, oh yes Anna it is just as simple as that. No, it really isn't at all. I have been out of work since completing my NVQ, I do occasionally work for my parents. But that is just as & when they need me, so nothing set in stone meaning no routine. The only routine in my life I have really is driving & blogging...believe me, we all need a little bit of routine.
Image found on weheartit
So you know the whole excitement of the weekend coming round & then suddenly going in the blink of an eye. Well, yes I really miss that. Every day feels the same. Some thing recent in my life has made me think sooner or later this routine will be easy to grab. I really want to get back in a routine. Will it be hard to get in a routine? Yes, it really will. But you know what, once I have that routine back in my grasp, I'm going to hold on very tight! It will be so worth it.
Do you have a set routine?
Do you get the excited feeling for the weekend & the Monday blues that might follow?
Let me know in the comments.
I really do love hearing your opinions.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

My Driving Journey - Lesson 33 & 34

Really, 34 lessons gone by already?!
Where does the time seriously go! (okay then granny Anna, you can be quiet now).
I can't believe how much I've learnt & to be honest with you I feel like my confidence has grown during this time too. Win, win if you ask me.
Tuesday 15h October
So today we drove to the next village & I got to practice a reverse round a corner, this went pretty well. Since the next village has a lot of speed bumps I never really fully know what speed is best to aim for since regardless some of them just throw you. After this we headed to the other side of town & I got to practice a 3 point turn & both times I made it round in 3, I love it when that happens. I did accidentally hit the kerb once when reversing but I suppose atleast you know when you've gone too far back & I'm pretty sure I'm not the first person to bump into a kerb & I know for sure I won't be the last. After this it was time to head back home & one more manoeuvre was ready to be practiced...a parallel park, I do quite enjoy these but just like everything else it won't go great every time. It did actually go pretty well though today.
Thursday 17th October
Ooooh, today was the day of a dum dum dum....mock test! I obviously have never done one of these & I wasn't really too sure how it would go. Sharon went by explaining exactly how the test would work & obviously that each examiner is different, grading wise. Some will be really strict & others might let things pass as a one off, then the next time it happens it will be a minor. I managed to get 9 minors, which I suppose is okay since she did a mixture of how the examiners would be. I don't really feel like it was one of my best driving lessons to be fair. A few things did go wrong but we have to make mistakes to learn from them. I did find it funny how we was quiet in the car because obviously some examiners will want silence. Well can I just say I do not deal well with silent situation. I found myself giggling a little bit & if you was in our car you would think we had had a fall out. We are usually non stop chattering from the minute I get in the car to the minute I pull up at home. How on earth am I going to cope on the actual test?
So there is a run down of my lessons this week (well technically last week). 
It still feels weird actually adding questions to the end of these posts because I didn't start my blog to gain readers, I just started as a way to express myself & get out whatever was driving me crazy in my head. But I am so grateful for the people who read my waffle & hopefully enjoy it. I really enjoy communicating with you so let's get down to the questions, shall we?..
How many lessons/hours did you have until you passed?
Which manoeuvre did you find easy peasy?
& which manoeuvre did you find to be a tough cookie?
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Sit Down Sunday - 20th October 2013

Sit Down Sunday, what is that you say?
Found out a little bit more by clicking here.
Image found on weheartit
- supportive family & friends
- communicating with the lovely blogging girls
- receiving surprise parcels
- new opportunities
- positive feedback
- Nicholas McDonalds beautiful voice
- new slippers, toasty toes
- my blog, to express myself
- Activia little breakfast pots
- shortbread, yum
What little things have you enjoyed/been grateful for this week? 
Let me know in the comments below.
I love hearing what you have to say.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Just had to share this video with you..

Short & sweet post, I was going to blend it in with my other post today but it just didn't fit at all so I thought I'd post a quick separate one just to share this video with you.
This morning Jonny Benjamin on Twitter shared this video with his followers. It was a response to The Sun Newspapers article that caused quite an uproar with their headline '1,200 killed by mental patients'. I do follow a fair few of people who have been affected by poor mental health & well you can imagine they wasn't best pleased to say the least.
But Jonny has created this video in response called Sometimes (I'm Schizophrenic)/All Of The Time (I'm Just Human). I think it is a real eye opener & just proves that we are all human.
Please watch it, it is fantastically created.

What did you think to the video?
Has it made you look at people affected by mental health difficulties a different way?
Let me know in the comments below.
Thanks for reading.
Feel free to share the video around too.
- Anna ♥


Changes, do they scare you too? I know when I was younger, pre high anxiety I didn't really think about change, at all. Yeah, things changed but I just kind of went with the flow of things. I suppose in a way I still do. But what happens when things aren't looking great for you but your scared to make any changes? That is when you might have a dilemma on your hands. If I speak to you personally you will know what might be changing for me, I won't be saying anything on here just yet though.

I absolutely love flicking through weheartit especially when I'm on the hunt for an image for my posts. For this post though I managed to find six (I closed the app & looked no further, otherwise we may have had a huge collection), the more pictures the merrier I say. So I hope you like pictures & quotes.
This quote is so true. I feel like I sometimes find myself moaning about my high levels of anxiety. Just to let you know I'm starting to class my anxiety as high levelled because we all have anxiety, it's just when it is higher it becomes a pain in the bum. So yes, I moan about my situation..let's be honest, who doesn't? But instead of moaning I'm going to try my best to actually change my situation, change my life for the better. Yes, I know it will not be easy but you know what....
We have all heard & probably been told the saying, "things don't get better overnight". Rightly so too, things really do take time. Yes getting the negative thoughts & the what ifs out of my head wont be easy, shutting them up/swapping them for positive ones though will definitely be worth it in the end. I will be glad to look back & think how tough times were & be proud of myself when I have got through them & have life back on track that little bit more, not on hold anymore. I know how easy it is to listen to & let those negative thoughts control you but believe me, if we all just change those thoughts around..will things be a little bit brighter? Surely....
& well lets be honest if it doesn't push us in the right direction, where will it push us? Exactly, it can't push us backwards so what do I/we have to loose? Absolutely nothing. Once your affected by something it is so easy to let it control you, such as I'm currently letting my anxiety control me. I don't want to fight it anymore, I don't want to beat it off with a big stick. What I do want to do is take it on a journey with me to getting better & being able to cope better. I don't want to stay the way I am right now, I want to be back to the me before hand with lower anxiety levels. So I will be taking it along on the journey & if we just happen to separate paths along the way that is absolutely fine. 

I thought I'd add share these quotes with you because I think they all are very true & honest. 'If you're avoiding the pain, you're also avoiding the joy', how true is that? Life is up & down, sometimes we have to experience pain to then experience joy. The first example to pop in my head is when a woman gives birth, I can't imagine that is a painless experience but can she run away & hide? No, she has no choice..it is coming out whether she likes it or not. So then once the pain is gone she will experience the joy of having a new born baby & the future ahead.
What do you think about change?
Be honest, are you happy with how things are?
Are you scared of change too?
Let me know in the comments below.
I genuinely love hearing from you.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Hey, let's talk about....swearing

I took to Twitter at the beginning of the week to get others opinions on swearing. I started blogging for me, a place to have a voice.. somewhere to express my thoughts inside my head. Never did I think I'd actually have any readers. But I actually have regular readers now & it is great. Thank you guys! So every now & then (I think I was planning on doing it towards the start of every month) I like to get others involved in my weekly series of 'hey lets talk about....'
Over the past year or so I have noticed that my dad swears a heck of a lot. I'm not sure whether I'm noticing more because I'm at home more, if he has always been like it or if it is as he is getting older..I don't actually know. But I tell you one thing, it drives me potty. Yes, I'm sure we all swear every now & then but when it becomes a ridiculous unnecessary amount I think it is uncalled for.
Here is what a few others have to say on the topic....
"Basically I'm not bothered about it. I tend not to do it because I don't wanna come across as more aggressive (unless that's what I'm trying to do). I've no problem witnessing it unless its ridiculously unnecessary, in which case its annoying!"

"I'm quite torn when it comes to swearing. Growing up using bad language was something I was always taught not to do however it has crept in to my vocabulary. There are certainly situations when I think it is completely unacceptable, for example using it as an insult, in front of my parents, children, strangers, elders, when complaining, debating a point or having a heated conversation when I believe it can not only be disrespectful but also unbeneficial to a situation. On the other hand if I'm feeling upset, angry or stub my toe it can also be a great release and an effective way of demonstrating just how you feel. If you must swear, always swear responsibly."

"I think that swearing is a subjective thing and it depends completely on the circumstance and company as to whether it is appropriate to use. I'll admit it; I sometimes swear. I'm pretty sure that everyone does once in a while. Sometimes all it takes is dropping something or stubbing your toe and it just kind of slips out. In all honesty, I have no problem with that whatsoever. For the most part, I tend to not worry about how people talk or whether or not they swear. However, in my mind there is a kind of scale of acceptability when it comes to what words will offend me. I know that's really stupid; after all a word is only a word, but it is true. One word in particular springs to mind (I won't say which) and I get annoyed if anyone uses it around me.
When people are unable to string a sentence together without throwing in some kind of expletive, I feel that it is just going too far. Trust me, I've known plenty of people that suffer from this issue. They can be talking about the most mundane thing and yet in slips a completely unnecessary expletive as if it makes them cooler or "harder". It doesn't and, in my opinion, the overuse of swearing shows a lack of vocabulary and isn't attractive. There are literally thousands of words in the English language. Surely you can find one to substitute that swear."

As you can see everyone has their own opinions, I didn't put a limit on what each of the girls could say. I just let them write however much they felt about swearing. I do agree with them, especially both Rachael & Debi's part about stubbing your toe.

What are your opinions on swearing?
Do you think it's completely fine?
Or maybe you think it is uncalled for & unnecessary?

Feel free to leave your opinion in the comments below.
I'd love to hear what you have to say about the subject.

Ooh, do you know Rachael & Debi both have blogs too?
They are two of my favourite, why not check them out.
Rachael can be found by clicking here.
Debi can be found by clicking here.
Go be nice & spread some love the girls way.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

My Driving Journey - Lesson 31 & 32

32 lessons, that can't be right....can it?
Oh yes that is absolutely correct. I'm pretty sure I'm becoming like a broken record now, but I actually can't believe it....
Tuesday 8th October
Manoeuvre based lesson today, I really do enjoy these & I really can't get over how quick driving lessons actually go. Today I got to practice reversing around a corner & parallel parking first off..I'm pretty sure I didn't get to practice a 3 point turn during the lesson. Note to self, I need to wrote down in my book straight away what I did & then I will remember. 
We pretty much finished off the lesson in a car park practicing bay parking. I think I must of practiced about 6 different times on 6 different spots (bays in driving term, pretty sure it's American..do Americans call a parking spot a bay?) I only practiced reversing in to them today & some of them were a little off but not everything can be perfect every single time. So I'm not going to beat myself up about it, I'm just going to try a little bit better next time. I did want to practice more & more to get it better but unfortunately time was up.
Thursday 10th October
Well I'm going to start off with the situation before the driving lesson, we are all human & we all make mistakes. I thought my lesson was at 11, just like I did last Thursday actually. Apart from this time I only actually realised when my mum had come to my room to say get up & get ready before she left for work & I was all, 'it's alright, my lesson is at 11'...Yeah, I was wrong. Infact the lesson was at 9 & when did I discover this? When mum opened her blinds & shouted to me that Sharon was outside..So my lesson that should of started at 9 started at 10 past, not bad going if you ask me. Mad dash to get ready certainly wakes you up I can tell you that much.
So today we basically just went on over to the next town so I could see where the test centre was. If I'm honest with you it isn't as scary as I expected. I kind of expected just one big building but it was nothing like that at all. It was just one office in a row of about 8 offices. Nothing to be scared of or worried about at all. I only got to drive to the test centre & back because then time was up.
During my lesson today I learnt that my weak point is roundabouts, I definitely need more practice on them. I seem to stop when I can actually go & then go when I should actually stop. Not exactly safe & definitely something I am going to work on & I'd like to think I'm not the only one who it has happened to while learning. Can I just add that I don't go out in like a wreckless kind of way.

Well that is two more lessons down, how many more to go?
I do wonder, progress is still to be made.

Are you learning to drive?
Are you considering learning?

Let me know in the comments below.
I really do love hearing from you guys.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥ 

Sit Down Sunday - 13th October 2013

Don't know what Sit Down Sunday is all about?
Find out by clicking here.
Image from weheartit

There is so many different versions of this quote, my last weeks was pretty similar actually but it is so true...I LOVE it!
This week I have enjoyed/I'm grateful for....
- my mum
- family friends
- my very understanding driving instructor
- spending time with my grandma
- spending time with Ned & Finn
- Skype
- Hollyoaks Later, oh my!
- Chunky scarves
- Being able to get warm & cosy
- AA theory test app, comes in handy
- Miranda Hart 'is it just me?' book
What are have you enjoyed this week/are grateful for?
I really do enjoy hearing from you.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

BIG love for Blogger & Bloglovin'

This post is a special post since it is my 100th post I have published on to my blog. Admittedly at the start I did copy across some of my old posts from my old blog over on Wordpress. But hey, I did write them & this was to be my new blog so it only seemed right to bring them along with me.
I really can't believe that I actually have wrote 100 posts, that is just crazyyyy!
My post is just going to be a happy post full of loovveeee....
all we need is love, do do do do dooo...love is all we need..
Right enough of the little sing song outburst that just went off.
It is just going to be full of love for both Blogger & bloglovin'..
do you share the same love as I do?

Photo so simple yet so cheesy?
I don't care, it pretty much is what the post is about all in one edited snap.
I always find a post with a picture looks so much nicer than just words.
I'm sure you are already aware of what both of these are, Blogger is the website which allows so many of us to create our blogs & bloglovin' is the website which allows us to follow our favourite blogs.
When I first started blogging I did have a little go at Blogger but wasn't 100% sure on if it was for me so I tried Wordpress as it seemed a little simpler. After deciding I really enjoyed blogging but preferred the whole look of Blogger blogs better I then hopped on board. It wasn't easy to get used to at first & I still do get stuck with little bits but I do find it so much better. I'm also enjoying teaching myself little bits & bobs to create & experiment with.
I can't even remember when I actually came across bloglovin' but I'm so glad I did. It allows me to keep up to date with my favourite blogs. Even if you don't want to comment on someones blog then bloglovin' gives you the option to like it by hitting a little heart.

I don't actually have anything else left to say other than how much I really do love being able to use both of these sites & being part of the blogging community. Do you agree with me?

Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.
I really do love hearing what you have to say.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Hey, let's talk about....preparing for my driving theory test

This let's talk is definitely more of a let us talk about..
So I really would love it if you would get involved & comment below.
I need your help, I'm not quite begging on my knees for your help...I'm not at that stage at the minute, everything is hunky dory right now.

Basically if you've been following my driving journey you will know that recently my driving instructor has mentioned practicing mock driving tests. First thing first though before actually doing my practical test, I need to pass my theory test.
I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one to struggle with keeping focused on learning, especially after leaving school. Obviously once your in school your so used to revising it's just like breathing to you. But since I left school five years ago (well that made me feel pretty old..) I haven't really had to study, not even really for my NVQ because it was just spread out for so long & mainly kind of just coursework related work. So I'm going to be honest with you, I'm struggling & I'm in need of your help...please tell me you are willing to help me. I will be really grateful.
I thought I'd just go ahead, ask you some questions & hopefully get some responses.
How do you manage to stay focused?
Do you feel the time of day affects how you revise?
(that sounds a kind of stupid question)
How often do you revise for at a time?
What do you think is your best revision method?
Turns out I don't really have that many questions to ask but I'd really love your help. If you have absolutely any advice for preparing for my theory test & keeping focused, I will be extremely grateful.

I'd love to hear your feedback.

Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

My Driving Journey - Lesson 29 & 30

I seriously can't believe I'm actually typing this..
Did I actually think I'd get past 10 lessons? If I'm honest with you I was debating it.
Here I am though, writing up about lessons 29 & 30. That is 30 hours in total, it really doesn't feel like I have been learning to drive for that long. They do say time flies when your having fun right? Well I am, I'm so glad that I can share my journey with you (yes you, reading this), that is if you haven't got bored yet. I really hope I can inspire somebody else experiencing mental health difficulties to give it a go.
Tuesday 1st October
I had a feeling today would be a manoeuvres kind of lesson & I was right. We drove around my local town & the surrounding villages whilst occasionally being asked to stop & perform a manoeuvre. The first manoeuvre I completed was a 3 point turn, shall we just call this one a 5 point turn? I hate when cars appear in the road that I'm doing my manoeuvre on & typically today there was a car coming from both side, brilliant. If I'm honest I think that just started the lesson off bad because it didn't really pick up from there. We then moved on to an estate where I got to practice parallel parking, that didn't go down as smoothly as I would of liked it to either. But we have to make mistakes to learn from them.
Next up was some independent driving, Sharon explained that on my test the examiner will have a piece of laminated card with a diagram on as such. Her example was a line going up then across to the left then down again & across towards the right of the paper. This means that you have to follow the diagram. So I had to follow the road until I came to a T junction where I had to turn left & then the same again & the same again. You have to follow the road until you come to T junction & can't go no further, sometimes you might come to a crossroads & they expect you to turn then but they will say. This actually went really well.
Then we headed through the middle of town, I haven't driven through it up until now. The roads are made pretty narrow with traffic coming both ways & cars parked up too. A bus was coming so I let it through but I pulled in abit too close to a parked car but I just had to turn away from the car straight away & we was fine. After driving through town I then got to go onto another estate & practice doing a reverse round the corner, I wont go into detail but the first one didn't go too well & then the second went a little bit better. I think it is safe to say that my lesson was a slight disaster? I'm sure I'm not the only one who will have one of those.
Thursday 3rd October
Today I managed to wake up thinking that my lesson was at 11, oh no..I was mistaken it was actually at 9. So mad dash to get ready in a way, I felt like I wasn't fully awake but WOW I soon woke up when I realised I had to be up, ready & out the house. I was on time, awake & alert. We drove to the next town today & I got to practice some junctions, basically just turning left & then at the next one I'd turn right & then the next I'd turn left...I'm sure you get the idea now. Then we headed across to another village which then lead us on to a much busier long stretch of road, where I got to practice going at a faster speed obviously. I wasn't used to going so fast that every time I went to change gear I didn't dare take my foot off the accelerator. Which as you can imagine made an awful noise & I'm sure it didn't do the car much good either. Once we had got onto the normal road again I knew exactly why I wasn't taking my foot off the gas, I was too scared incase we slowed down too much. We obviously wouldn't of & now I know this I will be absolutely fine next time. I even got to over take a lorry. This lesson actually went pretty well. 
WOW, that really looks like a lot to read. If you read it all thank you, it really does mean alot that I can share this journey with you.
I really love hearing from you in the comments too.
Thank you for reading.
- Anna ♥

Sit Down Sunday..Introduction/First Week

Ooooh, Sunday morning is upon us. I know a lot of the lovely blogging ladies have a cup of tea & catch up on their Bloglovin feed or Google reading list while tucked up in bed or curled up on the sofa. Wise move if you ask me.

I really like the idea of the series called Thankful Thursday that is floating around the world of blogging. If you don't know what it is basically you just list everything you are thankful for that week so far. I have been toying with the idea of creating my own series called Sit Down Sunday.

Each Sunday I will be listing everything that I have enjoyed that week & everything that I am grateful for that week too. I think it's great to sit down & reflect on the week. It will definitely be a way to appreciate the little things in life. We all get so wrapped up in the bigger & better things in life that we really do take the little things for granted, without even realising or meaning to. So what better way to reflect than on a Sunday morning.

I really love this quote....
Let's get started then shall we?
- Fish finger sandwiches
- A new found love for Wispa hot chocolate, we all need this in our lives.
- A new pillow on my bed
- Dog walks
- Blogging community
- Winter coats
- The smell of Cola bottle soap
 - Babysitting
What have you enjoyed doing this week?
What are you grateful for?
Let me know in the comments.
I really love hearing from you.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

My fear of dogs....Exposure really works?

Oh my, yes it does! If it wasn't for this experience I think I would still question it myself.
It might be best to start from the beginning, usually the best place to start a story. I don't remember my age, but when I was little. I want to say I was under the age of ten. I was on my neighbours garden with her dog & a boy who lived on our street when he decided to kick the dog & the dog turned round & bit me..Well that was a short story for you. So as you can imagine since then I have had a fear of dogs. But since the fear didn't actually ruin my day to day life I never actually thought of facing it at all. If I saw a dog in the street I would maybe be abit cautious, if I went round to someones house who had a dog I would be scared. Some people might find this odd since we actually have a dog, she used to be my nans, then we ended up having her because my nan was put into a care home. My nan hadn't had Molly (our dog) from a puppy so when she came she was well trained & didn't like kids much so she kind of stays clear. That is probably why I haven't been bothered by her. So Molly isn't the dog who actually got me over my fear..
The dog who got me over my fear without me actually realising is this little monkey....
Meet Pudding. This photo was actually taken on the day the family who I actually class as my second family got him. I can remember that afternoon as clear as anything. I was out walking Molly when I got a text saying "are you coming up tonight?"...I'd just like to state this seemed very odd as I don't usually get asked I just usually just turn up whenever, well that makes me sound rude. It isn't in a rude way at all I can assure you. So I texted back saying "yes sure, if that's okay" & the response I got was "of course, it wouldn't be the same without you!"...Well at that point I knew full well they had picked up the puppy! I knew they had been to have a look at some puppies because they had told me & hoped I'd still go up even when they got one. They knew that I didn't like dogs, well I'd just like to state now I think they have seen me more now they actually have Pudding haha..
Here is a few pictures of me & Pudding on that very first night at his new home.
These photos just make me smile & makes me think of it as he is thinking "yes, I like you...we can be friends."
Like I've said he isn't my dog but the family on my street who are like my second family. I actually class them as family compared to some of my blood related family. I have known the second family over 10 years, I've been visiting them since the oldest son was born & he will be 11 next week.
So over time like I usually do, I went up & visited, played with Pudding, created a friendship with him...people who don't like dogs will be thinking, a friendship with a dog, yes it is a friendship. He just turned one a few months ago, so over the course of a year I have slowly but surely gotten over my fear of dogs & it is all down to the second family & their new addition Pudding, I'd like to say thank you & actually dedicate this whole post to them. Even my mum & the second mum figure laugh now when I'm play fighting with Pudding & they go "rumour has it Anna doesn't like dogs"..They wouldn't be lying but now it is a thing of the past. Now when we go dog walking if I come across another dog I don't run the other way....quite literally, I just stroke them & carry on walking. Or when I go to my god mum's house I used to be scared of her dog but now I sit on the floor with him & have a play. 
The whole point of this post was to prove to you reading this that exposure exercise for anxiety & fear does actually work, if you just take it a step at a time. This is my proof that exposure exercises do work & it keeps my hope alive. I know one day I will get over/learn to cope better with my anxiety that is with me every day, until then..I shall take each day as it comes, one step at a time.
To round this post off I'm going to throw in a few more photos of Pudding....
Top left - "if I can't see you, you can't see me".
Top right - "WOW, there is so much room in here".
Bottom left - Just watching Mr Stink with my human friends.
Bottom right - "Shaking my booty".

Top left - "Hey guys, when did we get a new puppy?"
Top right - "You talking to me?"
Bottom left - "You want it? come & get it"
Bottom right - "Who you looking at?"

"Being this adorable is hard work you know".

 Top left - Before one of our dog walks.
Top right - Walking in the fields.
Bottom left - Molly & Pudding.
Bottom right - Me & Pudding during a walk in the snow.
Okay, admittedly I didn't plan on putting that many photos in but he's just too cute & I couldn't narrow down my choices. I hope you enjoyed this post & really hope it gives you hope & makes you believe you can overcome your anxieties & fears, one step at a time...each day at a time.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥

Hey, let's talk about....the pressure of being perfect

Since I really like to have an image on my posts this week I couldn't find a suitable one so instead I just created a little image on picmonkey. I was thinking of keeping it as kind of basic image for the weeks when I can't find an image....
the pressure of being perfect, do you feel it too?
A lot more recently I have felt the need to be 'perfect'....
I'm sure you know the kind, the two I've been feeling recently are appearance & performance pressure.
Appearance pressure - The pressure to look a certain way, maybe like a celebrity. I think though we all forget that the celebrities we see are just ordinary people like you & me. They will have flaws because you know why, they are only human. I think sometimes people completely forget that, even though it is a pretty obvious fact. They might even feel the exact same pressure some of us do to look a certain way.
 One of the main pressures I feel is to have a 'perfect smile', you know the kind....pearly white straight teeth to go with it too. But I actually doubt that anyone feels they have the 'perfect smile'. Even though we may look & sigh in hope that one day we could have their smile, we don't know how they feel about it. Probably they don't class or feel it is perfect. But you know what, it isn't really the end of the world if I don't have the perfect smile & the same goes for you. Are we still able to smile? Yes, well I know I am. Is that what matters? Yes, if I have something to smile about at the end of the day I'm happy about that & the 'perfect' smile isn't on my mind. It has been out done by the other things in my life that are more important.
Performance pressure - This kind of pressure feels massive right now, the kind which you have to perform a certain way..live your life a certain way. But you know what by adding that extra pressure I'm just making it harder for myself. I knock myself down because I can't do certain things. I can't work full time, which I should be able to do at the age of twenty one. You know what though sometimes life throws things in your way which make it difficult to live a certain way or the way we want. I've learnt now that knocking myself down doesn't actually get me anywhere. But instead of knocking myself down now,  I now let go of that pressure & focus on the things that I can manage to do. Even if it is just working for my parents a couple of hours a day, three times a week...You can't get to the top of a mountain without a few trips & falls. 
The whole point of this post was because I've recently realised that nothing in life is perfect. That sounds really harsh but unfortunately guys, it is reality. Don't get me wrong you can get close to perfect I'm sure. But the point is each person on this planet will have a different idea or meaning of perfect, there isn't one set example.
Do you feel the similar pressure I do?
Have you discovered to let go of the pressure too?
What is your idea or meaning of perfect?
Let me know in the comments below,
I love hearing from you guys.
Thanks for reading.
- Anna ♥